AAA: Alex's Adventures in Austin

Big Blue Bertha Arrives in Texas!

2011-06-07T21:46:00.000-04:00

For Memorial Day weekend my dad drove 3 days and thousands of miles to visit me...and bring me Bertha, my gorgeous blue pick-up truck! Obviously, I have the best Dad in the whole wide world. I might be a little biased but he's pretty fabulous on any sort of Dad rating scale. I was determined to show him a good time in Austin and since my mom wasn't here and demanded photographic vicarious fun, I even got documentation!

We went to the history of Texas museum. Which is fun if you are a history buff like my Dad but not my favorite museum in Austin. They did have some interesting historical artifacts, like one of the original computer consoles from the Houston space control center. I was most amused by the gigantic Texas star outside...complete with birthday hat. It's a little washed out but considering I was using an iphone camera in the bright Texan sunlight it turned out alright.

Those stars are everywhere. Texans and their Lone Star are kind of ridiculous.

Then we hiked up to Mount Bonnel to see the Austin skyline and Town Lake. Of course, by hike I mean walk up 5 minutes of stairs. However, when the temperature hovers around 98 degrees it feels like you put forth quite a bit of effort. I would perhaps recommend this walk in a different season, for instance hot instead of hotter or hottest. Notice how my Dad is wearing long sleeves? He didn't even roll them up once.

That night I took him to gorge on real Texan barbecue at Salt Lick. Really, really amazingly good artery clogging meat. Ironically, I could eat their mashed potatoes but not their beans. Who makes beans with milk and mashed potatoes without it???

Spaz Attack, the Emma Edition: I had stripped the couch to wash the covers for my Dad's visit. I wasn't sure if they were dryer friendly or not, so I laid them out around the apartment to dry, 2 of which ended up draped over Emma's dog crate. Emma, being denied her normal comfy couch corner decided that the blanked spot on top of her crate would be a great spot to curl up. Which it was, for about half a second before it caved in and startled the crap out of her. Oh Emma, obviously we were a match made in heaven.

Blue Behemoth Bliss

2011-04-13T23:00:00.000-04:00

My amazing dad offered to drive down a pickup truck that he is retiring from his business Memorial Day weekend. It is in fact the same beautiful, blue behemoth that survived my first driving lessons. I'm beyond excited to have a car of my own. It's very environmentally conscientious to share a car but the fact of the matter is that in city with limited public transportation if Salsa Boy needs the car I'm a bit stranded.

I excitedly told my boss that I was getting my very own car. When I described it for him he looked a little bewildered and started the following conversation:

Boss: A pick up truck? You don't really strike me as the pick up truck type of person.
Me: Really? Why?
Boss: Well, you are kind of earthy. (This is entirely true, I do harp on about recycling and eating less meat in order to reduce my carbon footprint).
Me: Huh. I'm still going to drive the more gas efficient car to work but this way I won't have to depend on Salsa Boy (who is notoriously difficult to get going in a timely fashion in the morning) to get here if he needs the car in the afternoon.
Boss (looking decidedly doubtful): True....

The fact is that pick up trucks are wonderful. When you see strange and amazing things on the side of the road (and I'm hoping to run into some bookshelves soon or a table for my porch) you can actually stop and put them in the back. When attempting to parallel park you don't need to worry about messing up the alignment if you accidentally pop the curb. Perhaps the best gas guzzling feature of all is that it's an automatic. I will no longer have to worry about rolling back and hitting the lovely person behind me in traffic who decided to stop 2 inches from my bumper at the light. Also, it has a lovely assortment of dents (of which, I'm only responsible for some fairly minor front bumper scratches) which clearly tell other drivers to reconsider parking next to me, tail-gating, or attempting to cut me off in traffic. All in all, a wonderful deal.

Spaz Attack: NONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ~knock on wood~. I know, a rare few days when I can honestly report no major spastic occurrences. Unless you count such minor injuries as stubbed toes, which I don't

A Very Strange Animal

2011-04-10T13:36:00.000-04:00

There is rarely a day that goes by when I'm not slightly baffled or bemused by Texan culture. Texas might be part of the United States but culturally, I can't imagine anything being more different from New York, except perhaps rural Wyoming. In Austin, the vast majority of stereotypical Texan culture is often more discrete. Visitors are thrown off the scent by all of the "Keep Austin Weird" bumper stickers and the hippies visiting independent stores.

I suppose the bus ride was similar to any other I've had in the States. No one stared, pointed, or started talking about me in not so subtle tones.

On the other hand, strangers didn't strike up conversations with me either. (Notice the shorts! It's 93 degrees here.)

Then there are scenes like this one--where giant animal trophies hang on the walls above juke boxes and oblivious bar goers. Not a single person I was with commented on the animals until I pointed them out. Which warranted a shrug, as if to say, 'And? What's so special about that?'

Hello. I'm a giant deer head, here to ogle you while you imbibe malt beverages.

Sorry for the crap quality, my iPhone camera doesn't work so well in low light (and no I don't have the latest version with the flash). My mother likes to point out that I did buy myself a very nice Canon 2 years ago for my birthday. Oh well .

Spaz update: Two days ago I found a pair of earrings that I lost 6 months ago and have been pining for ever since. Turns out, they were in the change pocket of a pair of pants that were too big on me in Korea. (A few months of Texas living and all of my clothes fit again.) When I went to put them on, I felt the strange lump and VOILA! My favorite earrings ever appeared in my hands. I've been wearing them non stop ever since. Where is the spaz you ask? This morning I went to straighten out the slightly bent post (no doubt a result of living in my pants pocket) and broke it off instead. All I could think was 'absolutely typical.' Hopefully they can be repaired since they are the only earrings I own that I can't afford to replace.

Now to add to my ever growing list of professionals to find in Austin: a jeweler that I trust. Oh well.

Like Texan, Like Dog: Fat.

2011-03-25T00:43:00.000-04:00

Two days ago at the dog park I was informed that my dog was so thin! Which in the typical Texan way eventually arrived at the small group of dog owners telling me that they really thought she was too thin. Which is interesting considering everything I've read about dogs and the visit to the vet last week told me differently. In fact, she should really lose 5 pounds in order to be considered perfectly healthy.

Every other dog at the park was chubby. Sort of like their owners.

They also harped on her flea collar saying that the monthly spray was the only way to go. My last dog had a flea collar for 19 years and never got fleas. Why use something more expensive?

I smiled graciously and said I'd talk to my vet about it.

Sometimes, Texas drives me nuts.

Spaz attack: 2 minutes before my birthday ended I accidentally stabbed myself with a dart. It really made me miss the plastic tipped, electronic game version from Korea.

Small Adventures

2011-03-16T17:44:00.000-04:00

I went to San Antonio a couple of weeks ago and was very excited about blogging about it. Only, when I went to sit down and blog it didn't seem so exciting anymore. Lots of things are alien and strange to me (ie, all of Texas) but not necessarily interesting to anyone else. For instance:

Me: OMG LOOK!!!!!!!
Salsa Boy: What??
Me: RANCHES! Real, honest to goodness ranches!!!!! They look just like they do in the movies!!
Salsa Boy: ~laughs at me~ I knew it was a good choice to take the scenic route.

I continued to be fascinated by the dusty, rolling landscape while he continued to be amused by my reactions.

The plan was to do the very romantic river walk before going to his parents' house for dinner. Salsa Boy was excited to take me before tourist season hits and it is jammed packed with tourists. Unfortunately, being the calender-less spazes that we are, neither one of us was aware of the fact that it was Mardi Gras. Apparently, San Antonio took it upon itself to create a tourist boom with crazy Mardi Gras floats going down the river and live music. Romantic walks are less romantic when they involve very large, inebriated crowds. Still entertaining though.

Life is moving.

Innocent Questions Perverted

2011-02-26T00:15:00.000-05:00

Today I asked an innocent question for the 30th time of the morning and it went like this:

Me: What can I do for you today sir?

Sir: I don't know, what can you do for me today? ~highly inappropriate look~

This might be a good time to remind the audience that I'm 24. I'd hazard a guess and say the man in question was in his 60s.

Me: Uhhh.....really, what do you need? ~spotting checkbook~ Aha! Would you like me to check your account balance?

Sir: No thanks.

And then he wandered off to bother one of the higher ups. Who agreed with me after the fact that he creeps everyone out. However, while creepy it was also incredibly entertaining. I mean, who does that? I decided that I deserved an extra dose of coffee for my day. Coffee makes everything better.

Spaz attack:

Lack thereof! Yesterday, I got bored waiting for dinner to be ready and did a 30 minute pilates video ala netflix. It was actually kind of fun and I didn't hurt myself which seems like a good sign. I'd like to find a class or something to take that doesn't involve more than 5 minutes of driving. I miss good public transportation.

Monster Trucks and 911

2011-02-20T21:51:00.000-05:00

My new job has a slightly strange schedule. I work weekends but have Wednesday and Thursday off. For me, this is perfect. The art museums around here have specials on certain Thursdays. Anyways, I was sitting peacefully at my desk doing some paperwork when I heard a loud boom. I got up, went to the window and saw a giant spray painted pick-up truck with monster style wheels crash into the gate instead of waiting 10 seconds for it to sense the vehicle and open. Thinking they would drive off, I pulled out my phone to snap a picture of the license plate. Instead, the guy driving, threw open the door, vaulted the fence, sprinted away, climbed another fence and ran off. Leaving me with a gigantic truck blocking the gate.

Phone call to my manager:

Me: ~Blurt out story in high speed~ What do I do????

Manager: Call 911, the emergency maintenance guy, and then a tow truck.

Me: Okay, thanks! Sorry to bother you on the weekend! Bye!

The police showed up 5 minutes later and luckily for me, it was a stolen vehicle from a different county so I didn't need to call a tow truck-- they took it away for me. Probably faster than a commercial tow company too. How this vehicle didn't get caught sooner is beyond me. It was very distinct looking and the thief was obviously not the sharpest tool in the shed. The gates were a complete loss. The maintenance guy tied them open so that people could get in and out until the gate company can come out and replace it. What a mess.

Thankfully the rest of the afternoon was uneventful. I sent Salsa Boy out for vodka so I could have a cocktail after all of that. Of course, I forgot that I now live in the South where you can't get hard liquor on a Sunday. He managed to find me a place that had wine which is something. Chinese take out and red wine isn't a bad combo.

Spaz Attack:

I managed to close a binder on my finger today. Incredibly painful for about 5 minutes but no lasting damage.

Blogger/iphone FAIL

2011-02-15T20:30:00.000-05:00

Recently I got an iphone. AT&T had a deal where you got an iphone 3GS for $50. Since Salsa Boy already had a plan, the costs per month were minimal. Ever since then, it seems like I only turn on Marilyn (my laptop) about once a week to deal with financial stuff. Here is the problem: blogger sucks on the iphone. There is an app where you can post from your phone which is nice but it's really hard to read blogs on blogger from my dashboard. I get inspired to write by reading other blogs. SO I'm making a promise to myself--turn on Marilyn more often!

I started a new job recently. I'm not sure what company policy is about employee blogging so mentions of it here will be minimal. Let's just say that I work in an office. Apparently, I replaced a string of very nice people who were also dumb as rocks. I am redoing some older paperwork and the errors are phenomenal. Like...misspelling "February" or forgetting to fill in all of the blanks on a form. Like my 6th grade ESL students in Korea could have probably done a better job.

It made my OCD tendencies absolutely nuts. At least when I finish fixing all of these things I won't be tortured daily anymore.

On a more positive note: no major spaz attacks recently! Unless you count paper cuts from paperwork which in the grand scheme of Alex being a spaz is pretty minimal.

Car Spaz Attack

2011-02-07T15:27:00.000-05:00

So Thursday night it started to sleet and then snow. We didn't get that much snow but the roads were solid ice Friday morning. Being the south, the entire city of Austin shut down. I had to go into work but I wasn't really worried. When I was first learning how to drive my dad took me to an empty parking lot that was iced over and made me practice turning and losing control on ice so that I wouldn't panic when it happened to me on the road. He also made a point of taking me out to drive when the weather was bad.

Things I didn't take into consideration:
1. I learned how to drive in a pickup truck.
2. I learned how to drive in an automatic.
3. I learned how to drive with proper tires.

So after I said goodbye to Salsa Boy (who told me to drive carefully), I got in the car and cautiously headed out. I was fine for about 3 minutes, until I had to pull out from our property. When I went to shift into second, the car spun out and hit the curb. I smacked my head against something (no idea what, didn't hurt very much in the grand scheme of my spastic behavior) and then wanted to smack it again since I just did exactly what I said I wouldn't do. The car seemed fine and I headed on my merry way to work, thinking the crappy handling was due to the ice and not me hitting the curb.

Driving home, when the ice was all gone, I realized that all was not happy in car land. In order to drive in a straight line I had to hold the wheel at an angle. For whatever reason, car repair shops are not open on weekends around here. This morning I took my car in and....

Me: I think I need an alignment job.
Amazing Car man: No problem!
(after taking a look at my car): ....your control arm is completely busted and your tires are so bald they are about to burst.
Me: Oh man. Ummm, what's a control arm?

He took me back to my car and showed me what I did as well as the tread check which the poor tires failed spectacularly. So apparently my accident was partially my fault for not knowing about how to shift gears on ice and partially because my tires had zero tread. They were super nice to me and didn't try to screw me over on the price (yay for having my Daddy on speed dial who also knows the price of every car repair known to man).

This is my most expensive spaz attack to date, breaking a grand (tires included in that). C'est la vie. On the positive end of things, I didn't hit anyone else!

Spaz Attack: Losing the Car

2011-01-26T21:24:00.000-05:00

Last night Salsa Boy went out in the evening while I opted to stay at home. This morning at 8am, I went to the parking lot behind our building (which is fairly small) and realized that the car wasn't in sight. I walked to the other side of the building and it wasn't there either. At this point I started to panic because what if a friend drove him home last night and what if I have to call a cab to take me to work? So I dashed back up the three flights of stairs (miraculously in heels, without hurting myself) and burst into the apartment to demand where the car was.

Me: SALSA BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~hears shower noises~
Me: SALSA BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Salsa Boy: AH! What?! What's wrong?!
Me: WHERE THE F*CK IS THE CAR?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Salsa Boy: (~looking sheepish and apologetic~) I'm so sorry! There were no spaces! It's in the parking lot behind building X.
Me: WHERE?????
Salsa Boy: Calm down. ~Gives directions~
Me: GAH! Why didn't you tell me this earlier?????????????

Anyways, so I finally found the car, got in, started it...and realized that I couldn't see out of the windshield. That's right, it was 31 degrees and I had frost on my windshield. Salsa Boy does not have an ice scraper though he does have that defroster function. However, I didn't know how to leave the car on while the clutch isn't in so it could defrost itself while I scraped....with a piece of cardboard from the backseat. While recounting this story to my mom she pointed that if I put the car in neutral and pulled up the parking break it would work. ~head desk~

I managed to make it to work with 2 minutes to spare and everything was okay. Unless you count the fact that 2 major lights were out on my drive home making the lovely busy intersection treacherous as hell. Also, my break light went on.

I really miss walking to work. Driving is stressful.

Grocery Stores in America

2011-01-17T10:34:00.000-05:00

Growing up, my father and I went grocery shopping every Saturday morning at our local IGA. It has 4 aisles. Not 4 super long aisles, just 4 small aisles.

It's the type of place where they know my name and who in my family is allergic to what. When I was home for 2 weeks in December, they special ordered my favorite type of vanilla soy yogurt for me.

The store where I do my grocery shopping in Texas is huge. HEB seems to have more floor space than the local Costco. (This is not my HEB, I did a google image search.)

When I realized I forgot to get Cheerios it meant walking for a few minutes before I could get back on track. It's completely overwhelming. The only positive side is that reading the aisle signs only takes me a second as opposed to a minute like it would in Korea.

I have so far refused to go to HEB alone.

Life Spaz:

My food processor refused to turn on last night...right after I put the peanut butter and butter in to make peanut butter cookies. Salsa Boy beat the batter by hand for me but STILL IT WAS SO IRRITATING. I'm going to have my dad talk me through how to play with the wiring. I think it's just the connectivity in the back, nothing that some pliers and electrical tape can't fix.

Not much else. It's actually kind of nice when I can go a few days without causing bodily harm to myself.

The Spaz Chronicles Continue

2011-01-11T14:19:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, I think that I should change my blog name to the Spaz Chronicles.

Yesterday, I was sitting innocently on my couch when I went to move my leg to sit cross legged. All of a sudden I had an incredibly sharp pain in my foot. Luckily, Salsa Boy was home on his lunch hour and came quickly to my loud cries.
Me: AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! I got a splinter in my foot!!!!!!!!!!!
Salsa Boy: But...our floors our vinyl. And you are sitting down...on the couch.
Me: IT HURTS!!!!!!!!!! GET IT OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Salsa Boy: Right. Tweezers, where are the tweezers?!
Me: CUP! In the cup!
Salsa Boy: ...in the cup? In the kitchen?
Me: NO THE BATHROOM WITH ALL OF THE MAKEUP STUFF. ~loud moans/whines of pain~

He managed to find the tweezers and even get what turned out to be a chunk of glass out of my foot. That's right, I got a chunk of glass in my foot while sitting on the couch. I was really confused by this, after all we've only had the couch for a week and all of our glassware is still intact. Then I remembered that our couch came from a movie set and something probably broke on it during the movie. At least the glass bit didn't get lodged in my butt. Note to self: In the future, thoroughly vacuum all second hand furniture before use.

Despite the bleeding and shouts of pain it didn't turn out to be too bad once it wasn't actually in my foot. Then poor Salsa Boy got to go back to the office after his much more lively than expected lunch break.

As my dear friend Bambi* would say, "Oh, Alex."

*Obviously Bambi is not his real name as Bambi is not a stripper or porn star.

A Sneaking Suspicion...

2011-01-05T12:17:00.000-05:00

I have the sneaking suspicion that being unemployed really just means more hours of the day in which I'm free to be a spaz. Yesterday was a rather good example. Since there are only so many hours you can comb the internet for job opportunities I decided to make the most involved dinner I have ever attempted: the pot roast. When I went to put the pot in the oven I failed to notice a serious design flaw where there is a sort of heated lip that is very easy to knock against if you aren't careful. Fortunately, I discovered it by placing my thumb against it and getting a very large, painful blister. Why do I say fortunately? It didn't need any further attention until 3 hours later--by which time Salsa Boy was home and willing to spare my poor hands and take it out of the oven for me.

The pot roast was absolutely, freakishly delicious. I'm not sure how often I will be home long enough to make a pot roast but for an occasional treat, I'm a fan.

This morning I also managed to slam my foot into the corner of my bed, crushing 3 of my poor toes. However, that's pretty much par for the course for my mornings.

Up next, an interview for a real estate job! We'll see how it goes.

The Job Search

2011-01-03T16:07:00.000-05:00

Somehow, when I'm required to be professional I manage look put-together, avoid coffee stains, and even tripping. It's as if the adrenaline and nervousness kicks in to give me extra coordination skills or something. Of course, that doesn't mean I'm able to actually find a job.

This morning I had an interview that was absolutely terrible. I mean, I charmed plenty but when we talked salary it was a disaster. $8 an hour for a starting salary? For that, I might as well work retail and at least get a discount on something useful. Of course, customers are not nearly as cute or fun as children but that's another issue entirely.

I suppose the question is whether I just want something to tide me over or hold out for something that won't make me want to be stabbed with cacti plants intentionally.

Cuts, Cacti, and Curbs

2011-01-02T16:04:00.000-05:00

Cuts

The first of the year turned out to be one giant spaz attack. I somehow managed to cut my fingers 3 times while dealing with the laundry. You might not think that laundry is particularly dangerous but it is when it involves coordinated movement between two hands. I just kept somehow cutting my fingers on my own finger nails. They aren't even long or jagged! I really have no idea how I managed that. Since none of the blood got on my clean clothing it wasn't a big deal until I started coking dinner. Onion in open cuts is decidedly irritating.

Cacti

Salsa Boy and I just moved into a very nice apartment complex. I haven't had much of a chance to explore so we decided to go on the walking trail for the afternoon. It was really beautiful. This is my first time in this part of the country so there are all sorts of plants I'm not familiar with. Not to mention that the Texas version of winter requires a hoodie instead of 20 million layers. Soon we came across a large bunch of cactus plants. I got really excited. In the north, cacti are rather small and are generally found in pots in offices or homes of people like me who are terrible at taking care of normal plants. This was the real thing, growing all over the place just like we studied during the desert unit in the third grade. I asked Salsa Boy if I could take a picture with his iphone. He said, 'Sure, but wouldn't you like to be in the picture?' In retrospect, this was a terrible idea.

First, I stood a safe distance away and sort of pointed at them. Salsa Boy, being the clever film maker that he is thought it would be cool if I got behind them. No problem. I could crouch down near them without getting near the prickly bits. And look at this lovely picture. I'm deceptively close and there is no stabby action occurring.

Only, when I went to stand up I had all sorts of stabbing pain in my leg. Lo and behold, some of the sticklers had somehow jumped onto my clothing and into my leg.

This is me, attempting to pull them all out of my body. I failed, miserably. I thought I had gotten them all but when I tried to walk away I kept getting really sharp pains behind my knee. No matter what I tried, I couldn't seem to get whatever was bothering me out. We decided to turn around and go home. I bravely walked about 20 feet before I whimpered pathetically and gave up. Salsa Boy had to carry me back to the apartment. Once home, I discovered that I had a seriously giant splinter thing lodged at an angle behind my knee which took us a minute to get out. And by us, I mean that I breathed heavily and winced while Salsa boy worked it out with a credit card and some tweezers. However, being used to spastic injuries I got right back up and decided to get dressed again and continue our walk which continued without incident. I stayed far away from the other pretty cacti that I saw.

Curbs

So learning how to drive a manual car is a whole sort of other spaz attack sort of thing. Salsa Boy claims that I am doing extraordinarily well, since I am already starting on hills and what not. However, driving around an empty church parking lot is not exactly getting me 100% road ready. After practicing reversing out of a parking space a few times, he suggested that I pretend it was full of cars so we could work on controlling my reverse speed and precision. A good idea, no? So I pull into a parking space, put it into reverse and perfectly execute the maneuver. I got so excited that I forgot to keep an eye on what was going on behind me and drove up onto the curb. My last vehicle was a pick up truck--curbs aren't a big deal in a truck but they certainly are in a little 2 door car. There was a rather ominous noise and then of course, I got startled and stalled. To Salsa Boy's credit, he burst out laughing with me instead of freaking out about his car (which was fine, as soon as I put it in first and got off of the curb). I had to turn off the car and sit in the parking lot laughing maniacally for about 5 minutes before I could start driving again. It was just the last ridiculously spastic event in a long day of running into things, banging elbows, getting cut, and getting attacked by plants.

I hope the rest of 2011 is less spastic but on the plus side, it will make for good blog posts.

I hate AT&T as much as Dell!

2010-12-30T17:47:00.000-05:00

Salsa boy knows what an internet addict I am. He set up the internet to be activated for December 14th so that when we came back from our epic road trip I would be able to happily connect. No such luck. They screwed up and said they didn't have the apartment number so they couldn't do it. It's such crap--we live in a gated community, they would have had to stop in the office anyways and the office would have given them the apartment number and key since we did a key release. Whatever, so we gave them the apartment number and they said they'd be there yesterday. I waited at home all day yesterday and of course, no freaking internet person came. Salsa boy spent about 4 hours on hold and being given the run around between last night and today. Now the soonest they can get it in is the 4th of January--nearly 3 weeks later.

Dear AT&T,
Your customer service sucks at life. They are terrible. The only reason we have you is because the only other option is Time Warner, which is apparently worse at customer service (is that possible?). I will never recommend you to anyone. Also, I hate you.
Love,
Alex

Spaz Update: Does not being able to master how to drive a manual count as a spaz update? Seriously though, I've been trying really hard lately not to trip since the last thing I need is to end up in the emergency room without health insurance. There are some stairs in my apartment building that just cry out 'cracked skull' to me. I approach them with extreme caution.

To Blog or Not to Blog? TO BLOG!

2010-12-28T15:39:00.000-05:00

I've been debating for the past month whether or not to keep blogging. The thing is, I like writing even if no one is reading it. I have a shelf full of journals to attest to that fact. So I will keep blogging. Once I'm employed I will buy a domain name and change this blog to Alex's Adventures.

To catch up, in the past month I:
-Went on a road trip from New York to Virginia to North Carolina to Florida to Texas.
-Met my SUPER CUTE NEPHEW!
-GOT ENGAGED to Salsa Boy!
-Moved to Austin (with Salsa Boy)
-Applied for jobs
-Went to my very first theme park (Disney Land and then HARRY POTTER WORLD!!)
-Struggled not to hurt myself accidentally

The last one is extremely important because for a spaz to be without health insurance is just asking for trouble. I'm terrified that I'm going to trip going up the stairs of my walk up apartment and crack my skull open. I finally broke down and am looking for insurance to tide me over until I have a job with benefits. My Dad is the sweetest person in the whole wide world and is helping me out with that.

Back to the oh so exciting work of writing cover letters. I hate cover letters with a fiery passion. I understand their importance--I just hate writing them. Writing them makes me feel like my brain is being flogged with a whip soaked in hot peppers.

The Jet Lag Zombie

2010-12-04T18:16:00.000-05:00

From 9am until about lunch I feel like a happy camper. It's as if I've just woken up from a nap in which I elected to wear my pajamas. After lunch I start descending into what my mother calls 'uber bitch mode.' Basically, my body is whining that it's the middle of the night and why oh why won't I go to bed already? It becomes physically painful. I heroically persevere (and annoy everyone around me while I do so) until bedtime when I attempt to sleep. Then my body says 'but it's the middle of the afternoon! Get up lazy bones and go for a walk or something.' Stupid internal clock.

Culture shock is much easier than last time. I still hand money the Korean way but I'm not surprised when store clerks speak to me in English. However, I do get startled when I hear English conversations around me as I'm used to just having white noise or god forbid, k-pop.

There haven't been any major spaz moments, mainly because in my zombie like state I don't move as much as usual. Less room for failure!

Killing Time at Gimhae Airport

2010-11-30T23:46:00.000-05:00

I woke up at 8am this morning which was completely unnecessary considering that it takes maybe 30 minutes to get to the airport and my flight is at 2:20pm. Everything was packed and scrubbed in my apartment, I even cooked myself some eggs for breakfast! Upon strolling to the curb with my enormous suitcases a cab rolled to a stop and the very kind driver helped me load them into the car. We chatted in Korean and English (his English was excellent) for the entire ride and my travel anxiety was at an all time low.

When I went to check in, I discovered my bags were 4 kilos overweight each. Considering my fairly new home scale weighed them in at precisely the limit (22 kilos) I was a bit annoyed. Especially considering that the fee for each bag was $50 USD. No matter, too late to change things so I smiled and joked with the clerk and went to the other counter to pay my fee. There I was informed by the kindly workers for Japan Airlines that I would most likely have to pay Again when I arrived in Tokyo because the fee only covered me from Busan to Tokyo, not to my final destination, New York. Now, this would not be surprising if I had purchased two separate tickets. However, I bought the ticket as a package and it was labeled "American Airlines Flight ---- operated by JAL EXPRESS." This is very common, when I flew to NY stopping in China on the way home last year my ticket had something like that on it too and I didn't have to pay overage fees twice. Trust me, when I get to Tokyo I will use all of my finagling to get out of paying $100 again. I'm an English teacher flying economy class. Ugh. I think I will weight them again using my mom's manual scale at home to see if their scales are set wrong. If so, they will definitely be receiving a letter of complaint.

On the bright side, security and immigrations were a breeze. I greeted each security officer with the most polite form of hello and chatted a little with them in Korean. After the scan a woman searched my purse and in my ziplock bag, pointed out that the toothpaste tube was too big for regulation. I pulled that sort of helpless, innocent smiley look and said in a pleading, light hearted voice (again in Korean) that it was 'just a little toothpaste left in the big tube'...and she smiled and put it back in my bag. Using my Korean skills to get my way always makes me happy.

Spaz update: I have a huge bruise on my hipbone from running into a desk yesterday which is inconsequential compared to the following bit of idiocy. A co-worker surprised me in class with a chocolate cake for the students and me. I ate a few bites of amazing chocolate cake because I didn't want her to lose face by realizing that I am allergic to milky cake in front of all of the students. I figured, I've been so good lately, I bet 3 bites won't bother me. Terrible idea. Was sick last night and this morning. I got medicine at the airport pharmacy though and am feeling better. Oh well. The students loved it and my co-teacher got to eat a huge portion since I didn't have much. My mom promised me a fabulous lactose free chocolate cake when I arrive in NY so long as I swore not to give her any. No problem, I have zero desire to share it with anyone except maybe my Dad. Chocolate binge, here I come!!!!!

Note: Gimhae Airport is full of free internet lounges sponsored by various banks. Major win.

A Spaztastic Day-Moving Out

2010-11-29T07:09:00.000-05:00

I had a feeling it was going to be one of those days as I repeatedly dropped things in the bathroom this morning. Luckily, the only permanent damage was to my favorite eye shadow which shattered into a million pieces and made a ridiculous mess.

Despite my reservations, I made it through the day without even painfully bumping into a desk or spilling my coffee! My students (with the exception of one slightly evil 6th grade class) were bummed that I am leaving and my desk had a small mountain of farewell notes and little presents.

After class I ran to the post office to get another box to try and get my suitcases down to regulation weight. I brought it home, stuffed 15 kilos worth of stuff in, and off I went dashing back to the post office. I made it half a block before the box ripped and dumped all of my stuff in the middle of a (thankfully dead) intersection. Logical problem solving me was replaced by anxiety me-- who desperately tried to make the box go back into box shape so I could get out of the middle of the street. My stuff, instead of piling neatly sort of rolled about into an even bigger mess.

As I was desperately shoving away, a friendly grandmother came over and tried to help me--with a baby strapped on her back. She quickly decided that what I needed was tape and told me to hold on a minute. A minute later she popped back outside with a roll of industrial looking tape and helped me tape the box together. One of her friends (or another random elderly lady?) stopped to help us and in 2 minutes we had my box taped up and all of my stuff securely inside. I bowed deeply and thanked them both and then was on my way again.

I know that if the situation was reversed I would have done the same thing but to have that sort of help when I really needed it was just fantastic. It's not so bad being a spaz if someone is there to help you out.

Note-I came to Korea with 2 suitcases. I am leaving Korea with 2 suitcases and having mailed 4 large boxes. This does not count the 100+ books I have gotten rid of. I must try to curtail my accumulation habits!

A Cure for the Thanksgiving Blues

2010-11-25T07:02:00.000-05:00

I will admit it--I had fully prepared to spend my Thursday evening holed up in my apartment with a bowl of instant ramen and a book. However, my lovely co-workers had other ideas for me! As a thank you for doing the English club they took me out to Vietnamese style shabu shabu and then a coffee shop to sit and chat over our drinks. The oldest member in our group commented half jokingly about how lame we were--no drinking or noraebang! Let's face it, what elementary school teacher wants to go have a wild night knowing they have to deal with small children early in the morning?

Instead of feeling sorry for myself that my more traditional Thanksgiving plans had fallen through, I even had a good time. It was really sweet of the teachers to take me out and everyone even made an effort to speak mostly in English for the evening. After all, it was an English club gathering. Even though they didn't realize that the night they picked was Thanksgiving, it still meant a lot to me to be with people who I cared about for the holiday.

My family is still forbidden from speaking about the details of their amazing meal today until after I arrive in the States. Details about the exquisite gourmet food when I am denied access is just cruel.

I have three more teaching days left. I don't want to say goodbye to my students!!!!!!!!!! I will really miss them.

Alex's Adventures in Asia: The End of the Road

2010-11-22T07:09:00.000-05:00

I've been dreading making this announcement for months but here it is--on December 1st I will head back to the US for the indefinite future.

It was a difficult decision. I love the nomad lifestyle and the never ending adventures but I have a new nephew I want to see--not to mention the rest of my family and friends.

Perhaps I'll go back to the States and be horribly sick of it in 18 months or utterly jobless. Regardless, at one point I'm sure I'll end up back on the road and blogging.

This blog has been good for me. In the beginning (and dear god are those embarrassing posts) I used to just ramble on endlessly. I suppose I still prattle on a bit but I've gotten better at editing. I'll miss easily sharing my life with friends and family. Then again, being in the same time zone it will be easier (and cheaper) to pick up the phone. Maybe I'll keep blogging. I have no idea right now. All I know is that my apartment is mostly in boxes at the moment and I can't believe that these 2 years are already over. What happened to the wide eyed newbie who mimed in restaurants in an effort to get some sort of meal brought to her?

Expect a few more end of Korea posts before the death. To everyone out there, thanks for reading.

Naewansa

2010-11-15T10:17:00.000-05:00

Today we got to leave school at "2" to do some staff bonding. I'm not sure why they planned to have us leave at 2 since everyone teaches until 2:10 on Monday and then have to get the students cleaning and such. In any case, instead of grading papers and lesson planning we managed to head out by 3 to Naewan Temple (Naewansa) for a bit of "hiking" followed by food. Excited by the prospect of a bit of light hiking I brought out my full North Face gear and layered up. We arrived at the gate where most of the teachers promptly decided it was too cold to hike (??!) and drove around to the temple. We walked maybe 200 meters. I would have preferred to walk with the few teachers that did but not speaking much Korean I was confused about what was going on sort of thrust back into a car. I didn't mind terribly, it was still ridiculously gorgeous. Observe:

We are actually having a bit of autumn this year instead of heading straight into freezing weather. My co-workers laugh at my layers (I wore 2 shirts, 1 cashmere sweater, a fleece, and a winter coat...not to mention the leggings under my pants, hat, scarf, and mittens) but I maintain that it's warmer than winter. I just don't like being cold.

I asked my co-teacher about the funny bricks. Apparently they are for making some sort of soy product? Anyone have any insight into this?

Likewise, I have no idea why they were stringing persimmons but they sure do look pretty.

I love door pictures. Absolutely can't get enough of them. I can't count how many strange stares I've gotten for taken pictures of doors while traveling but I tend to get stared at no matter what, I might as well be doing something that I enjoy. Besides, isn't the turtle cute?

I wanted more time to play around with the light options on my camera but the teachers definitely just wanted to glance around get to the eating. I can't say I blame them. Not everyone got to start off their day with leftover homemade pancakes made from scratch drizzled in maple syrup.

Spaz update: We were talking about family at the table in sort of Korean/English. Three female teachers all had older brothers, 'oppa' in Korean. Unfortunately I tried to ask a male teacher in Korean if he had an 'oppa.' Apparently I implied that he was a woman because males use different words to refer to their siblings than females which I sort of knew but can never remember (let alone remember that 2nd male vocabulary set). He laughed riotously though it took a few minutes of trying to explain what was so funny. I will probably remember not to ask boys about their 'oppas' anymore. Probably.

The Accidental Interpretor

2010-11-14T06:07:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, I was chatting away with my dad on Skype at the PC bang. Nothing out of the ordinary there. Only about 15 minutes into the conversation, the college student who runs the desk came over to ask me something. This is unprecedented. Even though he tried to speak slowly, I only really caught the words 'chat,' 'talk,' and 'other foreigner.' I figured that I was bothering the other foreigner (who I hadn't noticed) with my chatting so I asked if chatting was okay. I had no idea what he was saying back to me only he kept mentioning the other foreigner. I stand up and realize that sitting on the other side of the divider is another foreigner, albeit he doesn't look like an English speaker. I ask the guy if my chatting is bothering him anyway and he shakes his head. I go back to being confused. Just to make sure I'm not bothering anyone I tell my dad that I have to go (which was a little sad because we were having a nice chat) and hang up. Finally something the college boy says clicks and I realize that he is trying to ask for help--the other foreigner is trying to set up a chat program and can't do it and the college boy has no idea either. Most people come to PC bangs exclusively for gaming.

I walk around to the other side and realize that the man's browser is in Russian. Despite being about 75% Russian I don't speak a word of it. Not even hello. I sigh, and explain in Korean to the college boy that we are both foreigners but I'm American and he is Russian and I don't speak Russian. That doesn't mean that I don't try to help. I go to google.com, search 'google Russian.' Then I ask the guy 'Skype?' Head shake. 'MSN?' Head shake. He slowly pronounces MAIL RU, which I type into the search engine. I click on the top search option, click on the download icon I see on the homepage and Voila, 2 minutes later the guy has his chat program running.

Obviously, I rock. The guy looks really grateful, says 'thank you' and happily logs on to talk to his family. The college student is also appears really grateful. Unfortunately by that time my dad has to go back to actually working and I go back to idly surfing the internet.

Spaz update: NONE!!! This is probably because I have done absolutely nothing this weekend except for cleaning my apartment and reading in Spanish. Unless of course you count going to make chocolate chip pancakes and forgetting the chocolate. However, plain pancakes still taste incredible, especially for dinner.

Kimbap--Making Changes (or Not) in Korea

2010-11-12T07:38:00.000-05:00

Today, I thought that I would try something new. Rather than eat in one of my few tried and true restaurants (ie, their food doesn't make my allergies decide to rip my body apart from the inside) I decided to stop in a new kimbap place. Kimbap restaurants are generally safe, so long as I am careful about the side dishes. Deciding not to stop at the new locale, I figured I'd order a new dish too. The following conversation has been translated from the Korean.

Me: Hello. I'd like one tuna-kimchi kimbap please.
Cook: One tuna kimbap?
Me: No. One tuna-KIMCHI kimbap please.
Cook: Ah. One tuna kimbap, one kimchi kimbap. Two kimbaps?
Me: No. One tuna AND kimchi kimbap.
Cook: No. It can't be done!
Me: ~sighs~. Okay. One tuna kimbap please. ~sits down~
Cook: (with other cook) Weird foreigners. Tuna kimchi kimbap. ~shakes head~

I'm kind of baffled by this. Now, I know from being turned away from restaurants that refuse to make me pizza without cheese ("it won't taste good!") that Koreans can be a little weird about order substitutions. However, since both kimchi kimbap and tuna fish kimbap are on the menu I figured it would be okay. I don't mind paying double. I just wanted something a little spicy for dinner.

The kimbap was delicious. However, as if to drive home the point that tuna and kimchi don't go together they didn't even give me any kimchi side dishes. Which, if you know Koreans is the height of strange. Koreans generally eat kimchi, in many forms, at three times a day. I think I shall ask my co-teacher about this tuna-kimchi combo question on Monday. Her mom makes amazing kimbap, she probably has an expert insight into the situation.

For those of you that don't know about kimbap, you can read this earlier post (scroll down until you see the pictures) or google it.

Last Night...at the Norae Bang

2010-11-09T20:43:00.000-05:00

For those of you living under a rock (or you know, outside of Korea) norae bang is Korean for 'singing room.' It's like karaoke but instead of singing in a bar in front of a bazillion people you get a private room. (Think of that scene in Lost in Translation.) After having dinner with my co-workers I was pressured into going to the norae bang next door. It's not that I didn't want to go...I would have just rather gone home and curled up with a book than subject anyone to my singing before massive amounts of alcohol.

Going to a norae bang with Koreans was completely different from going with foreigners. For starters, no one sat down. Everyone was standing, clapping, shaking tambourines and hooting encouragements to the singer. Of course, being the newbie, I was up first with a horribly off key rendition of 어머나, a song that I learned in Korean class a while ago. Later came 'Dancing Queen' with my co-teacher who can carry a tune but is just as shy as I am when it comes to singing in a room in front of 40 of your older coworkers. It was okay though I might have gone a bit red when the chants of 'ALEK-SUH!' started.

Whenever someone got a perfect score, the teachers would start chanting and the principal or vice principal would take out a 10,000 won bill spit on it a little (or pour a tiny bit of beer) and slap it on the TV screen. Their contribution to drinking money apparently. All in all, not a bad way to spend my evening and it did get me out of the house.

Spaz Attack: We finally got the new desks that we've been begging for all year (everyone else's desks got replaced last year but ours...and they were decrepit). Now my 6th graders actually fit under the desk without slouching awkwardly! Yesterday, I was circulating around the room before class started, asking students how they were, etc. when I walked into the edge of the desk. I promptly discovered that the edges of the desks desperately need to be sanded...since I managed to cut open my finger and start bleeding. None of my students have been harmed yet but let's face it, I'm far more of a klutz than they are. I had to run to the health room to get band-aids (and a sterile wipe to clean it out). The nurse worries about me.

Korean Socks: The Start of an Addiction

2010-11-06T23:50:00.000-04:00

Last year, when I bought a handbag, I got a pair of socks for free with my purchase. At the time, I scoffed at the ridiculous white, pink and gold bunnies and wondered what about me said 'I like to wear animals on my feet.' They went to the back of my sock drawer, where they stayed...until I was low on socks one belated laundry day and put them on. It was so utterly ridiculous that I actually enjoyed the experience and put them into my regular laundry rotation.

Earlier this year while shopping in a Korean market I saw a pair of socks with a cat lovingly holding a fish on them. For 1,000 won (less than a dollar) I figured, why not? I started wearing the cute socks on the first day of clean laundry instead of as a last resort. And no one even noticed at work because EVERYONE ELSE WEARS THEM TOO. I'm talking 40 year old women with cute animals on their feet. Why not? If you are going to go around in socks all day why not have them be absolutely adorable?

Friday was the grand opening of CNA in Yangsan. CNA is a shop full of amazingly cutesy things and school supplies all for very cheap. It was my favorite store in old Yangsan area but since the Hemingway closed I don't go as often so having a local branch makes me exceedingly happy. Somehow, with no purchase over a few bucks I managed to spend 33,000 won...including a giant pile of adorable socks. They cheer me up having something so ridiculous on my feet.

I am currently wearing the weight-lifting monkey socks. They are amazing.

Indian Summer BBQ in an Abandoned Park

2010-11-01T10:04:00.000-04:00

One of the local expats decided that it would be a great idea to have a barbecue to celebrate the gorgeous end of summer/fall (...yes this is from mid October but I was lazy then!). Theoretically, this was a fabulous idea. He knew of a beautiful park that was seldom used. Everyone was gung-ho and planned out what to bring. At 2pm on the appointed day I called around to get more specific directions. No one knew where it was. There was no helpfully drawn map ala Microsoft Paint on the Facebook event page. It wasn't remotely near any major landmarks or labeled streets. There wasn't a name we could give a taxi driver. Finally, I got a hold of a slightly agitated Brit (agitated from all of the very lost people calling him I imagine) who was not the host but appeared to be the only one to have found the park successfully.

Unfortunately for me I was traveling alone (since it started at 2 and I was running late) and thus had no one to foist the direction getting task on. Doubly so that I am terrible with directions...especially when given by someone speaking with a strong accent, rapid fire, and with distances given in meters. Nevertheless, by 3pm I made it to the park, only 10 minutes behind the rest of the hoard.

The park was absolutely magnificent. The entire area is being developed but none of the high rises are done yet. All of the infrastructure was completed in advance--right down to the neighborhood parks. I will admit that it is very eerie to walk down empty 6 lane roads, pedestrian bridges linking nothing in particular, and sidewalks with benches almost hidden beneath weeds.

Yes, Crazy West Coast Boy (I think I may have referred to him in an earlier post as Bike Boy) brought a BB gun with him. Luckily, the only things harmed were a single soda can that he managed to find for people to use as target practice. I shot a gun for the first time in my life. It was a very strange feeling. For the safety of everyone involved, I aimed in the general direction of emptiness. I mainly took pictures of where the people were gathering, on the pavilion and the big game playing area but there was also a giant playground complex and some grassier paths. Most notably was the working bathroom (albeit without toilet paper or soap but I came prepared for all contingencies).

Yes, we cooked food for about 20 people on two tiny little grills with two tiny little skillets. Good thing people brought side dishes. I made several very well appreciated contributions:
   ~Orange juice not mixed with alcohol for those of us on antibiotics/not wishing to drink.
   ~50 cups
   ~a gigantic garbage bag (you have to buy special city ones, basically you pay for how much trash you have)
   ~a roll of paper towels
   ~a big bunch of bananas for people like me who get cranky when food isn't readily available (and you know, for dessert).

The pavilion where we gathered and ate. Everyone is turned to watch our very riveting game of kick ball. None of us had played since elementary school but someone got the amazing idea that we should play. With ripped bits of cardboard for bases and a soccer ball we were ready to go. It was Team America (I think we actually called ourselves Team Scrambles but everyone else called it Team America) versus Team Accents (for everyone from South Africa, Britain, Australia, New Zealand, Korea, and Canada). Obviously, Team America won. I even managed to play without causing bodily harm to myself or anyone else. And while I managed to score some runs I did not once manage to catch or contribute usefully to my team in anyway while manning the field. This did not exactly come as a surprise to anyone involved.

See the flying figure with bright pink shoes? That's me! Running successfully between second and third base. And no, I haven't suddenly developed a paunch, that's my sweatshirt bunching awkwardly. Though it does bring me to a very awkward lunch conversation from today:

After finishing everything on my plate I go and get a giant second helping of rice.
Me: (in response to an incredulous look) I'm hungry!
Co-worker: Don't you want side dishes?
Me: I ate them already. See? Points to obvious sauce stains from the 3 sides.
Co-worker: Rice has many calories. Eat some side dishes and some rice, not so many calories.
Me: But I want the calories.
Co-worker: Looks absolutely incredulous.
Me: If I don't get enough calories, I get dizzy. The vegetables don't have enough calories.
Co-worker: Shakes head. Okay.

I do usually get seconds of the veggies too except that today they were so spicy it hurt my mouth. The gigantic helping of rice was also to help get rid of the pain. And before you scold me Mom, I did go grocery shopping this afternoon for fruit and nuts to stash at work for when I get low on sugar between meals. I even got enough to share with my co-teacher.

Back to the conversation: In America, when people make pointed comments about your food being fattening they are usually trying to hint at something. However, in Korea I weigh what I did back in high school. I'm thin even on the Korean scale of things. It makes it very awkward to have conversations that you Know aren't meant to be insulting in the slightest and yet somehow leave you feeling slightly despondent.

...Back to the BBQ.

It was a gorgeous night. An easy night where it was effortless to be in the moment and just enjoy life.

Sorry about the once a week posting. I have several post ideas lined up but not having a computer makes me an extremely lazy (lazier?) blogger.

1st Birthday Celebration in Korea

2010-10-25T07:27:00.000-04:00

I think that this is officially the longest I've ever gone without posting, barring my 3 month hiatus when I wasn't in Korea. Basically all of my friends are leaving Korea and in 2 weeks I will be alone. It's so strange to be the one left behind. My nights have been filled with last dinners and outings and the like. Not to mention having a job and being a bit lazy lately outside of work and social engagements. I could go on in this vein for awhile OR I could tell you about the amazing cross cultural experience I had 2 weeks ago. I thought so.

Lately, I've gotten friendly with the young music teacher who started this semester when the previous teacher left on maternity leave. There aren't many young teachers in school so those of us who are there bond together, despite language barriers. Anyways, apparently the 1st birthday is a huge deal in Korea. It makes sense, before modern medicine if a baby made it to the year mark it was much more likely to survive. I'd heard that they were a big deal but I'd never known anyone with an infant before (aside from my lovely nephew of course!). So Friday, my co-teacher, another youngin at the school and I got on the subway to head to the birthday party at Bexco. I'd only ever walked passed Bexco when there was an anime convention so I was a little surprised at the venue choice.

Not the likely site of a baby's birthday party right? Until of course I realized that Bexco was just a huge complex of event rooms of varying sizes to be rented out. On the 3rd floor there were three other 1st birthday parties happening at the same time.

The whole thing was ridiculously cute. There were photos of the baby and her family everywhere. It was actually one of the most tasteful events I've ever been to in Korea. The other young kids in attendance got a huge kick out of playing with the balloons (and they were allowed to bring them home at the end).

And oh god, the food. The food was AMAZING. Seriously. I was really jealous of my friend who tried all 8 cake desserts (and with the exception of a small bite from the chocolate cake that I stole, finished every bit of it). However, I was immensely pacified by the heaps of fresh fruit and rice cakes. I even got to try mangosteens, something I wanted to try in Cambodia but couldn't figure out how to buy since I didn't look at a picture of them before my trip (delicious). All of us walked away from the table in slight pain from over-eating. My co-teacher spoke longingly of the stomach medicine.

Aside from the good food, I got to spend my Friday night cooing over a baby. For anyone who has seen my devotion to my daily Jakob photos, you know how baby crazy I can be. Baby girl was adorable. Her grandparents were immensely pleased by how much she liked me.

Also may I mention how incredibly hard it is to catch babies on camera even on the fastest setting? 3/4 of my pictures of her came out blurred as she or someone looking after her moved to take care of her.

Surprised moment: Being asked to give a speech. I looked startled, stood up, said happy birthday in English and then Korean. Everyone applauded and my co-teacher translated the comment made after my speech was that everyone was delighted that they could understand me.

Next up...who knows! I've got lots of ammunition from the past couple of weeks. Not the least of which being some fabulous Konglish sitings....

Spaz Update: I got 3 mosquito bites in my last class today. Through my thick wool trousers and knit sweater. I hate mosquitoes. No one else was bitten.

Sports Day in Korea

2010-10-10T08:57:00.000-04:00

Sports day is a huge deal. My students have been practicing outside everyday before school for a month. Most of it was pretty standard, running races, relays, etc. Some of it was wonderfully Korean though. For instance, the coordinated warm up workout/dance routine thingy. Apparently, my co-teacher got graded on her ability to do this as part of her education degree. These are the first graders...they are slightly less coordinated than the upper grades. Immensely cute though!

I have no idea why international flags were hung. I mean there wasn't anything particularly international about the day, unless you count the fact that I was there. Which...I don't though the first half hour was full of intensely uncomfortable stares from the parents.

Okay, so at this point some of my 5th graders are putting on cone caps. My first two reactions were...really bad KKK imitators or dunce caps. I had no idea what on earth they were doing. Until...

The 6th grade boys hoisted them onto their shoulders and started charging the red team.

The goal was to knock/grab the hat off of the other team. It was absolutely hilarious to watch and the boys participating were laughing pretty hard too.

Next up for completely and wonderfully Korean (or at least, I'd never seen it before Korea) was the Hanbok race. Two 4th grade girls ran, put on hanbok as quickly as they could and then were helped up (and supported) while they ran down the backs of every 6th grade girl.

My absolute favorite race though was the 6th grade partner race. Basically, 5 kids would sprint a short distance and then pick up a paper. They had to then find the teacher or person (for instance, parent with a hat or sunglasses or whatever), grab their hand and dash to the finish. Since my co-teacher and I are the youngest teachers in school...our names came up a lot. It was really a lot of fun and there was much laughter all around.

Basically it was a pretty awesome day. Instead of teaching I helped call who was 1st, 2nd, and 3rd in races, stamped hands, gave out programs to parents, and ate lots of yummy snacks. The principal noticed my great love for the pumpkin jelly candy (he has yet to realize that I love any sweet without milk in it) and asked the PTA mom cleaning up the left overs to give me a giant thing of it. Which of course, I finished before dinner time. Rest assured though, I found out exactly what it was, how to spell it and where to buy it from my amazing co-teacher. Yesterday, I bought a gigantic bag of it.

Spaz attack: NONE! An entire day of being active without tripping over my own feet, crazy!

Spaz Attack!

2010-10-07T03:31:00.000-04:00

This morning, I managed to leave my house relatively unscathed. That was the end of my good luck. While walking up the stairs to my classroom I somehow managed to fall up the stairs and land on my face. Luckily my travel coffee cup lid is amazing and did not spill coffee all over my nice white shirt. Ten minutes later I knocked over my coffee while the lid was open and spilled coffee on a gigantic stack of student papers.

On the plus side none of my students were there to witness my ridiculousness AND no new injuries were sustained....aside from the papers.

Tomorrow is Sports Day at school. I am supposed to wear a track suit or equally sport attire. The closest I have to that are my college sweats...not something I want the parents or students to see me in. I'm not a sporty person. This is quite obvious from my inability to walk without causing injury to myself. I think I shall compromise with a sporty polo shirt, jeans and sneakers.

Happily, I am not teaching but will probably be expected to stand around a bit and cheer. That I can probably handle without hurting myself. Probably.

The English Club

2010-10-06T02:39:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was the second after school English club meeting...for teachers. Here is the most awkward thing about teaching a class for co-workers in Korea--navigating the social hierarchy. I am the youngest person at my school (except for my lovely co-teacher who is 9 days younger). Korean social rules dictate that certain titles/names be used in addressing each other, particularly with people who are older than you. It's really where a huge amount of foreigner faux pas are made. Now, if you are trying to have an English conversation club where you only speak English and these titles don't translate and even sound incredibly awkward or even rude in English. Not to mention that the over use of 'you' in English is also considered pretty rude in Korean.

I spoke with my co-teacher about it before class for about 15 minutes before giving up and deciding to spend 5 minutes discussing the cultural differences and asking each teacher what they preferred to be called. A few of them had English names (perhaps from their hagwon days?) and another one decided that she wanted to be called Meg Ryan. I love it.

Of course, I was super stressed before the first meeting but as usual, my stress was for naught. So far we have discussed our shopping habits and the current kimchi cabbage scandal. Next up: the Busan Film Festival. I think I'm going to try for a youtube clip of a movie (maybe just a couple of minutes) and then chat about it.

Spaz update: NOT SPECIFICALLY MY FAULT! Though I definitely blame my inferior genetics...I appear to be allergic to every brand of band-aids in this country. The adhesive makes my skin get a lovely, itchy pink rash that apparently normal people don't get. So when I put band-aids on my mosquito bites in an effort to not pick and scratch at them, I am ultimately defeated. I give up. Mosquito bite scars, here we come!

Dear Frost,

Please come early for a night or two and kill of the blood sucking fiends in my life.

Love,

Alex

"Oh, shit!"

2010-10-04T08:13:00.000-04:00

Lately there have been a plethora of students saying "oh, shit!" I have no idea where they are getting it from. There must be a video game or popular TV show or perhaps even a kpop song with the infamous "oh, shit." Usually, me telling the student once (very sternly) that it's a bad word in English and not to use it again is enough.

You'd think they were saying 'aisht' which is the somewhat equivalent Korean (I think?). Oh, no, these are very clear 'oh, shit's and well enunciated. In fact, I would be tempted to praise their accent if they weren't cursing.

My revenge:
Write: "I will not say bad words in class" 10 times...and have their mother (or available guardian) sign it. Everyday that goes by without a signature they have to do it again at lunch. I have yet to have a student have to write a paper more than 3 times before they realize that I mean business. (Why none of them think of forging their parents' signatures is beyond me. It's not like I could tell the difference, being hardly literate and all and completely unable to decipher Korean signatures.)

Sometimes I wish I was teaching university students (or private lessons) so I really could do a class on swearing and how to say inappropriate things.

Life Spaz-
Today's lunch at school was ddokbokki, normally one of my favorite Korean rice cake dishes. They took a perfectly good, traditional Korean recipe and added a bunch of stringy cheese. In 20 years, there will be cheese in every Korean dish and I will be allergic to it all. I tried to fill up on the rice, soup, acorn jelly, and kimchi but was nice and light headed by the time I left school. Of course, that could have been from the paint fumes of whatever they are renovating on the first and second floors....

Beppu! (The last of my Japan trip)

2010-10-03T08:01:00.000-04:00

This past week has been pretty crazy, preparing materials for Lesson 11, making new boards for my classroom (based on Lesson 11), preparing for the teacher's English conversation club, and you know, life. Anyways, here are photos from the last city I visited in Japan, Beppu. Beppu started out as a domestic tourist site but has definitely made it internationally. The city is famed for it's 'onsen' or bathing houses that are supplied by the zillion natural hot springs in the area. Not to mention the hot spring pools that you can't bath in but are fabulous to look at. The onsen were interesting but I've got to say, I kind of prefer the more modern, pamper focussed jimjilbangs of Korea. However, I'd never been buried in hot sand before or taken a mud bath and I do love that sort of experience.

Right outside of the train station there is a little free hand bath. It's not really That hot but I had fun pretending that my hands were you know, getting boiled and such.

As opposed to this hell, where you really would get boiled alive. These hot springs are called the 'hells' for their hellish appearances and temperatures. Why am I making funny devil horns? Well...I am at a hell. This one is naturally red from the clay in the ground that is constantly being melted and such by the water. Very cool.

A group of ladies coming in to look at a hell. Very strange. No idea what they were preparing for or taking notes on. Possibly tour guides in training? Cute uniforms though.

One of the craziest (and best) things about wandering around Beppu were the clouds of steam coming up everywhere from the onsen and such. It was just very surreal looking.

This is where we went for the mud baths. Sounds interesting, no? There was also some sort of natural mineral bath. The only downside was that there was no non mineral shower water. You couldn't use soap (I think it would pollute the ground water supply the way they had everything set up) so you came out of the baths with very soft skin but absolutely reeking of sulfur. Of course, being the wonderful spaz that I am I slipped getting into the first mud bath and cut my knee. I gripped the hand rails religiously after that.

After mud we went for some ramen. These are the random gourds decorating the walls of the ramen restaurant. Freshly made Japanese has no resemblance to its distant cousin, those instant packs sold at the super market. It's absolutely incredible. I ate all of my bowl and a good deal of Cragon's (who couldn't take eating so much hot food after being submerged in a hot bath for an hour). The lady who ran the place was also super nice and didn't mind the fact that I dragged her outside to point to the plastic food models to order. I'm sure she gets that a lot from foreigners.

Doesn't that just look like it's made of delicious???

After lunch we went to a free foot steam bath thingy. It was super intense. And yes, at the end of the day I was absurdly clean. Aside from the slight sulfurous smell radiating from my skin.

What happened when I flipped on the telly at the hostel. Utter strangeness! It was actually highly amusing. I love seeing other cultures' entertainment even when I don't understand it. This was a kid's program for learning English. Even better than that....

SUMO WRESTLING! I actually watched this for a bit. It was all sorts of amazing.

Thus wraps up my trip to Japan! Overall, I had a blast. I might do one more post on food...since I took a picture of every single thing I ate.

An American in Nagasaki...

2010-09-26T09:37:00.000-04:00

I almost didn't go to Nagasaki. It just felt awkward to go to a city that your country's government was responsible for decimating. And yet, it didn't feel awkward. No one treated us differently for being American. The museum and Peace Park focused on the history and the campaign to end global proliferation. It didn't bad mouth the Americans. The signs just stated the facts. My favorite part were the personal narratives that were recorded (with subtitles). They were the most depressing to be sure but absolutely fascinating. I wish I had gotten to see some when I studied the bombing in school.

Adorning many of the monuments were strings of folded paper cranes. I remember reading a book in elementary school about a little girl suffering from leukemia in the years following the bombing and starting to make a thousand paper cranes so that her wish would be granted but not being able to finish before she died. I wish I could remember the name of the book now.

I had lunch sitting down by the river...which was full of giant koi. It was wild to see them outside of little ornamental ponds.

And then I was off to explore the temples on windy back roads.

The temples all had working shrines and such but none of them were fully operational, that is to say, had monks living there. It was a distinct contrast to temples in Korea which seem to all have monks there in one capacity or another.

Prayers? Probably.

Very strange palm trees.

Aside from the temples were what the guide book called temples but really seemed like a shrine and a graveyard. Nonetheless, the shrines were interesting though I didn't take pictures inside of them (disrespectful) and people didn't seem to mind us wandering around. These little figurines were set under a tree outside of the main shrine. I'm not sure what the red aprons are for but it was a theme with the smaller idols to be adorned with a cloth cap or smock like the ones above.

A group effort getting down the stairs.

A cool door handle.

Don't do it! The little men said so!

Up next, Beppu!

Fukuoka,　Japan

2010-09-23T04:49:00.001-04:00

First,　apologies　for typos. Japanese　keyboards are Very strange. Japan is very cool. In many ways it's like a richer, cleaner version of Korea. Which　isn't to say that I don't love Korea. Anyways, so I took the ferry from Busan to Fukuoka and then was a bit lost as to how to take a bus requiring exact change when I only had big bills. Thankfully, the ubiquitous drink vending machines take larger bills. I finally arrived at my hostel, got dinner and then did something very exciting--I went to sleep. In my defense I have a head cold and sleep is highly necessary.

Me feeling very sassy at my very first Japanese temple. Tocho-ji was unimpressive architecturally but it did boast the largest wooden seated Buddha in Japan which was pretty cool.

At the next temple, there was almost no one there (and I'm not sure of the name) but the bridge was lovely.

Did I mention that I felt very chic/Japanese in my outfit? It's not everyday that a girl can rock fishnets, chucks, and a nice black dress and fit in perfectly.

Don’t let that statue's head get cold!

Definitely don't let that dog turd sit there!

Enjoying the park on the way to the art museum.

And finally, my boxed lunch (and fabulous Japanese beer) that I bought for the train ride to Nagasaki. I'm not sure when I'll update next as internet is pretty expensive but we'll see.

Sayanora!

Strange English and Lack of Updates

2010-09-20T19:13:00.000-04:00

Many writers are more prolific when they are down--that is not me. The happier I am, the more I write. Hopefully, spending 6 days in Japan will cheer me up!! I don't expect to update when I'm there, not because internet rooms/cafes aren't available but because I'm traveling on a serious budget. To tide you over, look at some amazing snaps of strange English that the Partial Asian took!

For all of your Muppet dietary requirements.

Make love on the table!

Konglish?

2010-09-13T10:23:00.001-04:00

Today, one of my 6th grade students was wearing this shirt:

I thought it was hilarious, random Konglish and the other two Korean English teachers in the building thought so too.

When I was breaking it apart with my co-teacher it dawned on me that I knew exactly what it was referring to. In my pseudo-advanced English class last year we were studying "Aesop's Fables" (I say this with quotes because they were butchered beyond belief but that's ESL for you) and there was a story about these mice getting butchered by a cat. The mice had a meeting and were all like 'let's put a bell on the damned cat so it can't sneak up on us anymore.' Everyone thought it was a fabulous idea until of course the wise old mouse asked 'but who would put the bell on the cat?' Or, in perfect Konglish: who will bell the cat?

Of course, I have no idea what 'hawnatural' is.

I miss having a computer at home, however slow and crotchety she was. Even if I was reading I'd keep Facebook chat on so I could chat with friends back home. It's lonely. So instead, I go to a PC bang and worry about dying from cancer induced my second hand smoke. Think, this blog entry is brought to you at the expense of my lungs! People as rampantly morbid as I am should be allowed to safely squirrel away in their studio apartments during off hours.

RIP Hermione

2010-09-08T02:27:00.000-04:00

Just in case you weren't aware that I was a huge nerd (in which case, where have you been?!), my computer's name was Hermione. As in Hermione Granger, the bushy haired nerd from the Harry Potter books. Anyways, Hermione needs yet another new motherboard, a power supply and honestly paying for them when I plan on getting a new computer in December seems silly.

Goodbye dear Hermione, you were a good heating pad, a slow piece of very breakable crap that gave me anxiety attacks with every crash during the school year--but I loved you anyways because you were my piece of crap.

She officially died late last week and since then I have read 3 books: The Heart is a Lonely Hunter (Carson McCullers), Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim (David Sedaris), Changing Places (David Lodge). The Heart is a Lonely Hunter book is stunning but the tone of it is so lonely that reading it alone in your studio apartment late at night is bound to get you down. The other two were good but nothing I probably would have chosen for myself. They just seemed like filler. Not pure fluff, not intellectually stimulating, just something to pass the time from after dinner until I go to bed. Last night I even found myself vaguely wishing that my TV worked. Making up my own dialogs to Korean TV shows is always fun...

I want new books.

Dear Amazon (or any other bookseller that ships to Korea),
Do you want to randomly decide to hold a sweepstakes and send me 20 books of my choice? Pretty please? I'll even write reviews for your website!
Love,
A bibliophile estranged from a library.

Oh the joys of being illiterate

2010-09-06T00:11:00.001-04:00

Friday afternoon I got an electric bill for 88,000 won (68 USD) and an official notice that looked suspiciously angry. I was confused since my electric bill is generally around 13,000 won (11 USD). I shrugged and got my co-teacher to look at it today. The company is claiming that I haven't paid my electric bill in three months and as such are threatening to shut off my power on the 15th if they haven't received payment. Which is nuts, of course I've paid my bill. Thank god I saved all of the bank receipts because when we called them just now they said that the computer has no record of my payments. Tomorrow I have to bring in all of my bank records, call them and then fax them over. What a nightmare.

Meanwhile I always feel guilty asking for help with things that I should be able to take care of on my own. It's just that the bills are so confusing with so many words that I don't know and trying to speak on the phone with someone who will shoot rapid fire questions in Korean is a bit daunting. I can ask where you are going for Chuseok but not 'I paid this what is going on?' And even if I could, I probably wouldn't understand the answers. My co-teacher doesn't mind helping me, the same way I don't mind checking over longer English documents for her but it still sucks that I can't manage on my own.

Spaz update: My toe still hurts like crazy even though there is no bruising or swelling. I'm considering going to the doctor but I would feel like such a moron. Hi, I stubbed my toe and it hurts. How? Oh, I walked into my bookcase. And honestly, it's not like there is some medical miracle for curing particularly stubborn cases of stubbed toes.

A New Principal, Spaz Attack

2010-09-02T03:33:00.000-04:00

We got a new principal for the start of the semester. In the USA, people tend to stay at the same school for several decades. In Korea, you can't stay for more than 5 years at one school and you are often forced to teach a different subject/year every year within that school. So much for fine tuning lesson plans over the year and getting comfortable with an age group. Tomorrow night we are having an official welcoming party. It's not like I have better plans but Friday nights are sacred. My priorities are a red meat dinner, chocolate, a beer, and some serious R and R. A couple of the new teachers this semester have struck up conversations with me (yay for my Konglish skills) but generally, staff functions are a bit lonely for me. On the plus side, there is guaranteed to be a plethora of food and booze which does meet two of my Friday night requirements. Does the new principal speak English? Who knows.

Spaz attack:
1. My lovely cut tongue is a bit infected. I can't exactly but Neosporin in my mouth so I bought some mouth wash and am using it a few times a day which seems to be helping.

2. Last night I stubbed/rammed my second smallest toe into the bottom of a bookcase. It's still seriously painful though it doesn't seem broken. I think I just bruised the bone.

Random: I went to the school library today to take out a kid's book to practice my Korean. It's called 고래 똥 향수 or Whale Poo Perfume. It's a little hard for me but I should be able to get through it with a dictionary. They don't seem to have any REALLY beginner books, probably because we don't have a kindergarten program.

Bring on the whale poo!

Summer Camp: Student Movies...and a SPAZ UPDATE

2010-08-31T00:14:00.000-04:00

The second week of summer camp went by almost flawlessly. It was partially because we touched up the lesson plans from week one but mostly because there were only 15 students instead of 25. On the summer camp evaluations almost every student commented about how much they loved making a real movie. For a group of fairly low level students, they really did a pretty good job writing scripts and stage directions in English. The day we devoted to script writing, one of the 5th grade teachers helped us out-- so for 4 groups of students there were 3 English speakers there to bombard with questions. Not to mention the stack of dictionaries. Each week, the most popular phrase used (with no prompt or spelling help from the teachers) was 'OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!' There were always ghosts, monsters, vampires, and aliens. This is what students are interested in, why on earth don't the state English textbooks have stuff that 10-13 year olds actually care about? Below are some of my favorite videos from week two. The sound on the first week's videos is a little wonky. ...Also, I don't feel like waiting for ten videos to upload.

This is called Vampire. The line you can't hear when the boys are around the corner is "Run you fool! She will eat you!"

My Sister Was Kidnapped was cute. They only had 3 people in their group but they wrote in a 4th character (the police officer) and begged my co-teacher to do the part. Of course she obliged!

One of my favorite videos won't load! It's about these vampires that fiend for coffee instead of blood and beat up on humans to get them to buy them coffee and such. Obviously, students after my own heart...errr minus the violence.

Ridiculous spaz update: While chewing an innocent bite of rice at lunch, I bit the side of my tongue so hard that my entire mouth got bloody. I am now sipping coffee that tastes like it's been flavored with blood. The student movies have abducted my subconscious!

I'm a terrible blogger or More Angkor

2010-08-25T03:36:00.000-04:00

I've gotten into my 'it's about to be a new semester I need to obsessively plan and make worksheets storm.' So far I have killed several trees but everything is double sided and amazing!

...And back to the pretty! More temple loving.

Me poking out of a window. I frequently took pictures and then said to Cragon 'you know what would make this picture perfect? A person in it!' Cragon got used to posing and taking pictures. And by 'got used to,'
I mean looking slightly exasperated in almost every single one. I smiled prettily because obviously my mother gives far more frightening guilt trips about coming home from vacation without a plethora of pictures of myself.

Just to give you an idea of the sort of steps I was climbing all day. Angkor is not for the feint of heart--or ankles. I dutifully wore my ankle brace until somehow, 4 mosquitoes bit me THROUGH the brace and the rubbing created so much itching I thought I was going to explode. This is why your mini first aid kit should always have anti-itch cream in it. Thank you, Dad for making me the most over prepared traveler I have ever met, it pays off sometimes. Of course I frequently mentioned that I would probably die of Dengue fever but I appear to have escaped unscathed. (The people climbing the steps are not us but some tourists who then took the same type of pictures of us scrambling up the steps.)

As you can see, it took me a lot longer to carefully pick my way up the steps than Cragon. Since I didn't sprain my ankle for the 4th time in 2 years, I have decided that moving like a sloth is the way to go!

...I just realized that these pictures are not from day 3 at Angkor as I originally thought but Day 1 at Ta Prohm and perhaps one other temple. Note to self: don't wear the same color shirt for major picture days. Ta Prohm is the temple above with the giant trees growing out of it. It should look familiar to you if you have ever seen Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (which I re-watched recently just to glory in the fact that I'd actually been there). Unfortunately, a lot of my cool tree pictures didn't come out very well because I was having some problems with the auto-focus on my camera. Apparently, Canon really doesn't like being in ridiculous 90+ temperatures with high humidity. Fair enough, neither do I.

The elephant and I are having a glorious conversation.

This temple was smaller than many of the very popular temples but the carvings were amazingly well preserved.

I could probably do one more post about Cambodia. We'll see. I'd like to go back to blogging about my day to day life eventually.

Cambodia, Angkor Wat Day 2

2010-08-23T00:41:00.000-04:00

Today I got an e-mail from my dad which said:
ALEX
DID WE MISS A POST?

(And yes, he really does do everything with the caps lock on.)
Back to Cambodia! I really appreciate everyone's support while I was moping away. I'm feeling better, and teaching really helps keep my spirits up. Having kids write scenes with lines like "OH MY GOD, it's blood!" is always good for a laugh.

For the second day at Angkor, we got up at 4:30 and left the guest house at 5 so we could watch the sunrise over Angkor Wat. Unfortunately, my camera is great at capturing sunsets but I couldn't get the setting perfect for sunrises. I really wish I'd consulted my mother on the proper manual setting the day before but such is life. It was still breathtaking. We also ran into some other acquaintances from Korea but I was too busy snapping pictures and oohing over the pretty to really want to talk. It just goes to show how small the world is sometimes.

There are many reasons why Angkor Wat is so popular among all of the temples. For one, it's absolutely immense. It is also in amazingly good shape, particularly the bas reliefs (wall carvings). There are hundreds of meters of them and each wall tells a story.

Angkor Wat is easy to get lost in (and I did). Note to future travelers: your Lonely Planet guide is not sufficient to get you around Angkor.

I could post every picture I took of Angkor Wat and it still wouldn't do it justice.

...because sometimes I get bored of smiling and victory signs.

More tomorrow!

End of Summer Camp, Week 1

2010-08-20T00:26:00.000-04:00

For two months before summer camp I stressed over every minute detail of my lesson plans. I agonized over how to structure multilevel writing activities. Everything that had to be modeled was scripted, practiced and memorized. In the weeks leading up to camp, I spent hours making elaborate custom flashcards and decorations for the board in my class. It kept me up at night, worrying if I had made the correct movie choice or if the kids would be bored. It sounds like overkill, to stress out about a one week program with my students that won't be evaluated formally or informally but the camps are really important to me. My winter camp students had a leg up on reading, writing and listening skills. They also had a renewed enthusiasm for the subject which was contagious in class. Sometimes the school textbook is so boring ("Where is the bank, Nami? Go straight and turn left at the corner.), that even fun activities don't really distract from the fact that elementary school students don't care about the material.

Yes, it sounds like I went a bit overboard with the planning but to be fair, with 20 hours for lesson planning a week I could afford to do it.

Basic Premise:
Theme: Movies (specifically, High School Musical).
Objectives: Learn movie specific vocabulary (actor, director, etc), practice creative writing, and listening skills.

My favorite moment was on Day 3 when we had the students work in small groups to create a short movie scene. Usually, every 40 minutes we take a break to let the kids get up, go to the bathroom and goof off. We called time for break, the students waited for us to finish talking, and then they ignored us and went back to work. Even my co-teacher was amazed. After class she said to me: 'normally, they really hate writing but they really seem to love this.' The scenes were hilarious and we helped the students figure out the blocking and a little bit of acting.

I love teaching camp. I wish I could always have this much fun with my students.

On death

2010-08-18T00:31:00.000-04:00

There is nothing to make you feel desperately far away from home as a phone call announcing someone's death. At eleven PM a couple of days ago my mother called me to let me know that my grandfather had died peacefully in his sleep. At 88 years old, that isn't a bad way to go. And yet, it was still devastating. For the first time in my two years of working in Korea, I took a personal day. My school was really nice about it and suggested that I take two days off but really, one was enough. Yesterday, I just couldn't face being cheerful and energetic after being up so late mourning. Today I was back and my students cheered me up just by being themselves.

My grandfather was unfailingly kind, supportive, and funny. Early this morning my mom put me on speaker phone while the family told stories for the rabbi to gather for the eulogy. I couldn't put my finger on any one thing that he did that was wonderful and yet he was the best grandfather I could have asked for.

It's hard to be so far from home when all I want is my family. I'm giving myself a few days from being responsible. I'll finish blogging about Cambodia soon enough though.

Angkor! Day 1...the morning

2010-08-15T01:58:00.000-04:00

I know I said I'd post Everyday to make up for not posting during vacation...but I lied. I'm lazy! I'd like to say that I was marvelously busy this weekend but mainly I slept, ate, read, and went for walks. Very exciting stuff.

Since we'd been traveling for 15 hours the previous day we decided not to get up to see the sunrise over Angkor Wat and save that for day 2. So instead we did a revised version of the Small Circuit which is about 17km and chock full of temples. I'd like to say that if I had my notebook I'd know what every picture was....but that would be a lie. I was just so awe struck and clicked away, forgetting that if I had trouble remembering the name of the temple we were at then I'd never remember it via pictures. It was just a bit of temple overload (in a good way). I do remember that the first few temples we did were Bayon, Bahphuon, Phimeanakas, Preah Palily, Tep Pranam, Preah Pithu, and the Terrace of the Leper King--all part of the city area of Angkor Thom. So the following pictures are from that area. Being at Angkor was like being in a dream, it's hard to articulate how beautiful it all is.

Walking toward the gate.

And these photos are just of the gate and me on the gate. I love the faces everywhere.

I'm not sure how to edit these photos. I have hundreds of photos of absolutely beautiful things, crumbling pillars, bas reliefs, spiraling heights....how do you choose?

Climbing to to the top.

Also, let me take a moment to remark upon my respectful attire. The guidebooks remind you that monks still use many of these temples and that they are in fact temples. Rules for the appropriate dress are not strict, your shorts should reach your knees and your shoulders need to be covered (i.e., no tanks). Most people complied or wrapped thin scarves over their tanks to hide shoulders and cleavage and yet I saw plenty of people wearing tube tops and short shorts. Disrespect in holy places (whether or not it's your religion) is a huge gaffe. At least it wasn't just Americans, I saw plenty of Korean and French people dressed outside of the guidelines.

The stairs of Angkor are terrifying. They weren't constructed to be ergonomically correct--it wasn't supposed to be easy to get to the realm of the gods. Add difficult proportions to years of erosion and crumbling and you start to get the picture. I saw many people avoiding treacherous stairs but if you wanted the magnificent views and hidden nooks you needed to climb the stairs. And while I may be a morbid and frightened person (I've already posted my will twice in the two years since I've had this blog) I've never let that stop me from what I want to do or explore. The worst that happened to me on the trip: mosquito bites. Not even DEET can save you!

More pictures, stories and adventures of Angkor coming soon.

The wheels on the bus go round and round...

2010-08-12T02:00:00.000-04:00

The bus ride from the south to Siem Riep was supposed to take 9 hours, 10 tops. We booked a larger, more comfortable bus with working air conditioning and luggage storage. However, I didn't think to ask if the ceiling was in good repair, I mean who asks about that sort of thing? It poured, I mean really poured for most of the trip...and the ceiling had many leaks. I spent the entire journey with my rain coat zipped up, my hood up, and Cragon's coat spread over my legs. It took 15 hours to get to Siem Riep. Fifteen bloody hours-- I don't even like sitting still for a 2 hour movie. The following bits I had actually forgotten about (read: trauma induced memory blockage) until chatting with Cragon trying to remember some more details.

What I didn't realize about the first bus to the south is that it had such a lovely horn, you couldn't really hear it inside of the vehicle which is important, considering people use their horn every time they need to turn or pass someone or alert a cow that is wandering in the road or something. This bus's horn was piercingly loud so that every time you had just managed to doze off 'BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP' and you are up again!

There was a TV on the bus, probably provided for entertainment but only served to torment me further with very loud, very terrible music videos and shows that defied logic. The volume was turned up so loudly that my ipod headphones could not drown it out, I had to endure the torture. I shall never again take a bus in Southeast Asia without ear plugs. Never.

Every 3-4 hours we took a 10-15 minute break to go to the bathroom, let the driver smoke a cigarette, and grab some food. Only, the places we stopped at had seriously questionable cleanliness. Now, I have a pretty hardy stomach when it comes to street food but there is no sense in tempting fate on vacation. I had a few baguettes over the course of the trip that looked safe and the rest of the cookies and dried fruit that I had packed as snacks. The toilets themselves weren't too horrible...it was just the plethora of bugs, flies, and lizards on the walls of the stalls that started to get to you.

The hardest thing was that there were no bilingual Khmer/English or Khmer/French speakers on the bus so we had no idea what was going on or even a rough idea of when we might arrive. At the stops the few French tourists and I would shake our heads and ask each other if we had somehow discovered something about how far we were.

This is the only whiny post from my trip, I promise. It was just a truly uncomfortable bus ride. I did however manage to put a large dent in Anna Karenina while there was still light. Coming up, gorgeous pictures of ANGKOR!!!!!!!!!!!

Lack of spaz update: I went for another run last night and didn't maim myself. Assah!

A ride to the jungle: Koh Kong and Peam Krasaop Wildlife Sanctuary

2010-08-10T21:31:00.000-04:00

I learned this the hard way: never ever let your hotel/hostel/guesthouse book a bus for you without really interrogating them on what sort of bus. For instance, I asked if it was air conditioned. They assured me that it was. They didn't mention that it was an old, tiny van with 15 people crammed in, minimal leg room (I'm 5'3", it takes a lot to make me complain about the lack of leg room), with barely functioning air conditioning. There was also next to zero luggage storage which meant that we had the joy of bags on laps. However, I arrived in Koh Kong 5 hours later, sweaty and cramped but happy to be off of the bus. Also very happy that I called ahead and arranged for a driver since there was a swarm of very eager tuk tuk drivers all vying for our business.

In any case, the Blue Moon Guesthouse was clean, comfortable and air conditioned. Can you ask for more? Not to mention that the lizard living on the wall seemed to keep the fly count down. We had booked their waterfall/jungle/island/ tour in advance which included a driver for the day and meals. However, we were later told by locals that it was a complete rip off at $25 dollars for the day since you could go out to the street and get a local driver for $5 for the day. What did I know? In any case, our driver was nice and the food was yummy. My only complaint was that they didn't take us to the island advertised that we wanted to go to, Koh Kong Island. We went to another smaller island which was okay. They claimed that the waters were too rough but they looked pretty calm to me. Who knows, I certainly don't know anything about boating.

Walk to the waterfall through the jungle. My hat may be slightly ridiculous but my face did not get sunburned during my trip. Sunburn=wrinkles and cancer. Ewwww.

Waterfall love! I went swimming in a calm pool to the left of the water fall in the river above. Nice way to cool off after a hike.

I stopped Cragon from stepping on a snake on the way back. As my guidebook pointed out, most of the snakes in Cambodia won't kill you instantly but antivenins aren't widely available in hospitals. Obviously, I saved him from a slow and painful death. Unless it was a Cambodian garden snake, in which case I saved him from an unsightly squishing!

The countryside was really beautiful, you don't have to go far outside of Phnom Penh or Siem Riep to find it either. Most of the country seems very rural. This picture was taken on the ride back from the waterfall.

The tractor in front of us on the dirt road.

Into the mangrove forest! This is another guy who joined our group for the afternoon. If you think my hat was silly...well imagine a cowboy hat with AX jeans and a Lacoste polo. Apparently, this mangrove forest is one of the largest untouched in Asia though I just got that via the grapevine. It was pretty surreal with giant roots like spider webs arching about.

On the river, all of those clusters are mangrove trees.

Fishing village on stilts, and only accessible by boat.

Highlight of the day was how many dolphins we saw. They were too fast for me to get on my camera, but believe me I tried. According to my book it was probably the endangered Irrawaddy dolphins.

Question: Too many pictures? Not enough pictures? Just the right amount? Leave your feedback and the dominant party shall be responded to!

Day 2: Genocide and Torture

2010-08-09T22:50:00.000-04:00

Everyone who goes to Phnom Penh recommends going to the killing fields. However, they were recently privatized by a Japanese company meaning that the profits of your admission are expatriated and aren't helping the local populace. I decided to skip the killing fields and instead head to the infamous S-21 prison where 17,000 people were tortured and murdered instead. S-21 was left exactly as it was found, with implements of torture, chains, tiny cells and converted into the Tuol Sleng Museum. Like the Nazis, the Khmer Rouge regime was meticulous about documenting their prisoners, each were numbered and photographed upon admittance. There were also extensive photos taken from after torture sessions. These have all been preserved and put on display in the museum, as well as some information given about the leaders and people who ran the prison and the Khmer Rouge--and their subsequent trials (or lack there of).

It was one of the most horrifying experiences of my life. The fact that the prison was converted from a high school just made it seem even more perverse. The equipment for working out and gymnastics on the grounds was all converted to torture instruments. I was shaking during most of the visit, with goose bumps on my arms despite the 90 degree weather.

These were the regulations of the prison. They have been reprinted and translated into Khmer, French, and English for the visitors.

This was the primary rule for visitors. Not very difficult to follow.

The size of an individual cell.

I believe these larger cells were for holding larger groups of prisoners and also torture sessions though with the absence of my journal my memory is not as precise as it could be.

An after photo.

After the museum, I got lunch and then hopped a 5 hour bus to the southern coast to visit Koh Kong. It was hard to talk about, to express how I felt about the museum. During my research on the Rwandan genocide my senior year, I often felt the same way, that verbalizing such atrocities was a strangely daunting task. It's hard to reconcile the fact that I am the same species as the people who committed these crimes and yet I am. Despite intensive research it is still so hard to get at the why. Sometimes I'm not sure if it's possible to understand.

I promise more tomorrow--and far less depressing material.

Day 1 in Cambodia: Phnom Penh

2010-08-08T22:13:00.000-04:00

To start, a Spaz update: I actually unpacked last night. Not out of some sort of new found love of unpacking but because I was looking for my journal. Confirmed: it must have fallen out of my handbag somewhere between Cambodia and Korea. For those of you who don't know me personally, I write compulsively. And when I travel I keep a record of what I do when and the names of things I ate especially now that I blog so I don't go 'and then I ate some funky noodle dish.'

I'm really bummed about this. I don't think I've ever lost a journal before (as evidenced by the giant shelf of journals I have in NY) and to boot this was a beautiful silk covered one that I bought last year in China. It did have my Korean address in the back so maybe some good Samaritan will mail it to me?

Actual tales from my travels!

So we had arranged to have a pick up by our hotel at the airport but they somehow didn't remember to do it. No worries, we pulled out the address, insisted to a driver that we had already paid for this hotel and didn't want another, and were off on our very first tuk tuk ride. A tuk tuk is a covered carriage thingy pulled by a motorcycle. Lots of fun though kind of nerve racking in the busy, dusty streets of Phnom Penh. I finally ended up closing my eyes during busy intersections and asking Cragon to tell me when we were through.

See how there are only 3 people on that motor bike? I have seen 5 people crammed on many times. Apparently there is a helmet law requiring the first person to wear a helmet since I saw someone driving without one get pulled over. Because you know, the people sitting behind the driver won't get hurt at all in an accident.

First stop: the museum. Mainly statues, temple carvings and writing tablets. What I loved best was that all of the tablets had translations of what they said posted. I mean looking at old writing is cool but not nearly as interesting and finding out what it says. The only disappointment was the post card selection where they tried to charge a dollar for a single post card. That's expensive by American standards!

And a very pretty building, built specifically for the museum in the early 1900s. EXACT INFO IS IN MY JOURNAL. Also, my guide book but I'm not at home right now...

"Oh how I search for things...with closed eyes!"....or how I become slightly delirious in the sun and do increasingly ridiculous poses. This is taken in the courtyard of the museum.

Onwards, we fended off very determined tuk tuk drivers who were determined to get our business to drive us to the royal palace even though it's only a 5 minute walk away.

I don't think I will ever stop being amused by monks on motorcycles.

The royal palace was actually much better than I had expected. In my Lonely Planet guide, the picture and description made it seem a little lame but in reality, it was stunningly beautiful even though you couldn't enter most of the buildings (since they are in use by the royal family). Unfortunately, we visited it in the afternoon when it was blazing hot and with very little shade or refuge from the heat. I recommend going in the morning but it wasn't open the morning we arrived due to a function or something.

Oh look at that magnificent ankle brace! I'm in front of the throne room here.

Monkeys in the complex. Very cute!

Pavilion thing. My descriptive powers know no bounds!

Lots of very cool doors for me to photograph. Unfortunately, I was having a little trouble framing pictures well in the intense sunlight but I got better at it as the trip progressed.

So I remember taking detailed notes about what we ate at this restaurant...and all I remember is that the starter was a green mango salad and possibly the most amazing thing that I've ever tasted.

I have no idea what we ate except for the fact that it was absolutely glorious and we devoured every single bite. The waiter had actually studied Korean for awhile in an effort to get a job in South Korea but the paperwork to get a visa was prohibitively expensive and complicated.

Coming up tomorrow: Day 2!

A night in Kuala Lumpur

2010-08-08T09:05:00.000-04:00

For whatever reason, it was difficult to find an affordable flight directly to Cambodia so we decided that a layover in Kuala Lumpur could be exciting. Customs and getting to the city center took a lot longer than predicted so we didn't get to our hostel until 8pm--far too late to really see any temples. Not to mention by that time Cragon and I were dying for dinner. We wandered around and decided to just get some cheap street food. We poured over the Malay menu (which had a few pictures) but 5 minutes later the owner managed to scrounge up a very beat up English menu! It was nice to at least know which animal we were going to be eating.

I have no idea what this is called. It was on the table at a lot of places, if you want one you ate it and they charged you for it. Basically rice, spicy curry with a bit of anchovy and hard boiled egg on top, wrapped in a banana leaf. Very yummy. Then I had some mixed rice dish which was very tasty though a bit generic.

Then we went to look at a building that was recommended by my guide book and isn't open to tourists even during the day. So you know, yay for not missing anything. The Sultuan Abdul Samad building is well, a building. Built by a British colonialist and now facing Merdeka Square which is the independence square. It used to be a rather large cricket pitch. My guide book says that the flag pole there is the tallest in the world but it is a few years out of date and wiki says it's 'one of the tallest in the world' so who knows. Wandering around the streets of Kuala Lumpur was more fun than actually looking at the building.

Me looking awkward and still in my airplane clothes! Notice the white thing on my toe? I somehow managed to rip up the skin on the bottom of my big toe 2 days before traveling. However, constant wrapping and coating with Neosporin during the day got it healed by the 2nd day of my vacation.

I don't know, it was fun to look at. I'd love to go to Malaysia one day and travel about. It seems like a really beautiful country and there are lots of old temples.

After wandering around (and getting very lost, we had to take a taxi back to the hostel) it was time to crash.

Not so exciting first post but the rest of the vacation series shall be FULL of gorgeous pictures of Cambodia, spaztastic tales, and so forth! If I don't post everyday this week, feel free to send me hate mail.

Alive and Adventurous in Cambodia

2010-07-31T08:20:00.003-04:00

Dear Readers,
I'm alive, well, and having the time of my life in Cambodia. I'll do a real post when I find somewhere with internet AND air conditioning...which may be when I get back to South Korea.
Love,
Alex

Travel OCD and mini Spaz update

2010-07-25T21:05:00.000-04:00

I take travel preparation to whole new levels of ridiculousness. My mother commented that she really needs to stop asking me if I've done 'x' because not only have I done it, I've gone even more freakishly organized than expected. My med kit is carefully packed in a quart zip lock (with a smaller travel version inside to go in my day bag for on the road spaz attacks). Every Korean over the counter drug has been labeled in English. Cragon has been quizzed on my existing medical conditions on the off chance that I suffer a severe spaz attack and need to be hospitalized. My passport has 3 copies made to hide in my carry on, checked bag and left with a coworker at work, not to mention the scanned copy that my parents have in the off chance that everything I own is stolen and I need it forwarded to my embassy.

The thing is, nothing major has Ever gone wrong on any of my trips. But I'm ridiculously morbid (but Cragon, what if the elephant throws me and crushes my legs and you need to know my blood type?!!!) and being over prepared helps me feel calm. That way when I finally get to my destination I can just focus on having a good time, taking in the sights, and snapping an inhuman amount of pictures. And you know, not tripping over my own feet.

Spaz updates:
1. I reread my last post to see try and remember what I last rambled about when I realized that in the first line was an apostrophe error that my first year literature professor in college (and adviser) trained me out of. I think she would have smacked me with a giant stack of papers if she ever saw it. Rest assured, it has been corrected.

2. Not my own! I bought a cheap cotton cardigan to take with me since all of mine are cashmere or wool and completely overkill for south east Asia. E-mart forgot to take off the sensor so now I have to make ANOTHER stop this afternoon to have them remove it. Thank god I saved the receipt but seriously, what a pain in the butt.

Running:
Friday I ran an entire mile...and then I walked the mile on the return trip home. I am so ridiculously out of shape. That mile killed me. I took the weekend off from running but I WILL run again tonight. I have yet to trip ~knock on wood!~ but then again, I'm being inordinately careful about paying attention to my footing.

Never, ever go a year without exercise if you can help it. The return is so painful.

Who do you ask for directions in Korea?

2010-07-22T20:47:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, the Yangsan Book Club had its first outdoor meeting. There are these awesome circle benches near the subway station with good lighting so we sat, sipped our beer and discussed Cairo Modern. It felt more ...organic to meet outside. More grassroots somehow. More indie maybe? I can't quite put my finger on it. However, there are interesting complications that arise when you meet outside.

1. The very obvious: bugs. I asked my co-teacher about bug spray but she wasn't entirely sure where to buy it or the generic Korean word for it. Something tells me that I'll be miming in a store in the near future.

2. Evangelists on street corners trying to prevent us from getting to our meeting place. Usually it's the Jehovah's Witnesses but last night it was the 'Our Holy Mother' people. All of them realized that with 70+ foreigners in the area it was time to upgrade to carrying pamphlets in multiple languages. Three of us made it by but they caught Blondie for a minute. Silly polite Blondie.

3. Rubber neck stares. It's like people driving by a traffic accident, they slow down and keep watching as they go by. Fortunately, the conversation was interesting enough that it wasn't too distracting.

4. Interruptions. Now, if you were a lost Korean and there are plenty of Koreans around, why on earth would you ask the group of obviously foreign people for directions? To be fair, we did know where she was trying to go...we just couldn't exactly express it coherently in Korean.

5. Witnesses. Today one of the teacher's at school was so excited to tell me that she saw me last night. Actually, it was kind of awesome because she was so curious that she didn't mind using Korean and English to try to explain what she had seen and her questions. It was our first real conversation together and I really enjoyed it. It means that I probably won't go the entire day without speaking to anyone if I have already had one real conversation before 10am. That could just be wishful thinking though.

To do today:
1. Read another 100 pages in Anna Karenina.
2. Book a hostel for Siem Riep and Kuala Lumpar.
3. Write an article that's due tomorrow... (oh procrastination...why do I allow you to happen).
4. Go for a run. New route today and hopefully it will cool down a little once the sun goes down. Attempt to not trip over my own feet.
5. Attempt to not expire from extreme boredom/ennui while desk warming.
6. Maybe study? Ennui has killed my zeal for studying. Hopefully vacation will revitalize my insane passion for over-achievement.

Desk Warming, a Sad Fact of Life

2010-07-21T21:45:00.000-04:00

There have been many posts about desk warming in the blogosphere lately. Mainly because I don't know a single public school teacher who doesn't hate it. It's one thing to be tied to your desk when other people are and there is stuff to do...it's another thing when there are 2 other people in school and you are already a month ahead of schedule in lesson plans. Also, my co-teacher and I like to collaborate on all of the lesson plans so I really don't like to do them without her input.

Yesterday I did the all important:
-Read the Korea Times, the Korea Herald, the JoongAng Daily, the New York Times and the BBC.
-Every blog and web comic that I follow
-50 pages of Anna Karenina
-Watched 2 episodes of Eureka (older sci-fi channel show)
-Studied (a very small amount...have plans to do more today)
-Wrote down the starting and stopping times for the songs I'm doing during summer camp...at the end of next month.
-Made 3 cups of iced coffee.
-Filled the ice cube trays.
-Spent an inordinate amount of time on facebook.
-Started to lose my mind.

Talk about ennui. Most people would say that getting paid to do nothing is a luxury but I hate sitting still for hours at a time. I'm much more productive when I have smaller bits of time to work with. This is how lunch went (the 3 of us ordered in bibimbap): (Conversation has been translated from Korean to English).

Me (to new office worker, referred to as OW): Hi, what's your name?
O.W.: It's __________.
Me: ~repeats to clarify pronunciation.
O.W.: Yes.
Me: My name is Alex.
O.W.: nods.

~We go on eating in silence for a minute.~
O.W.: (to the music teacher) Where do you live?
Music teacher: I live in _________.
Me to OW: Where do you live?
OW: I live in ________ (name of apartment complex)
Me: Really? I live near there!
O.W.: ~Nods~

Then there was conversation between the two of them which got too complicated for me to follow. It is going to be a very lonely time until vacation. Last day of desk warming: JULY 27th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then I am off to Cambodia with a quick stop over in Malaysia until the 7th of August. Then some more desk warming until camp starts on the 16th. When I get back from vacation I will deep clean my classroom and decorate for camp. I'm doing a movie themed camp so I have lots of pictures and labels to put up. My lesson plan for 5 days over 9 pages, not including hand outs, examples, scripts and so forth. I need to script a few of the last days line by line (when teaching low level students it's super important to think about how you will say and present everything) but I'm going to save that work for after vacation since I will have far too much time on my hands when I get back.

Running update: No spaz attack yet. I've been very careful. I'm also inordinately sore. I refuse to ever go this long again without exercising. Getting back into shape is supremely painful.

Feel free to leave me the links of your blog or your favorite blogs to read in the comments. I'm so bored I'll check them all.

The Spaz Goes for Run...

2010-07-20T03:26:00.000-04:00

...And didn't die or get hurt!

In the past year and a half I have sprained either or both ankles 3 times. For the first time in my life I have been seriously out of shape and it was really starting to bother me. I'm never overweight but not having real muscles is so weird. Yesterday I was uber productive. I came home from school, got my books, met the Partial Asian for dinner, studied for 2 hours and then went for a run.

It was slightly pathetic. To be fair, I was doing loops at the base of the mountain, so lots of up and down but still. There was much panting involved. I also managed to startle the crap out of one of my students when she was out walking with her mother.

The weird thing is, I usually hate running. I have almost never voluntarily chosen it for exercise. Usually, I find plain running boring and painful, even when I'm actually in shape. It's just that for weeks I've been having dreams where I'm running. Not how running in my dreams usually goes when I'm being chased by something menacing but just running for the sake of it and feeling incredible. It wasn't as effortless as my dream but it still felt really good.

Things to know about running in Korea:
-Most people don't run in the streets. They go to parks or down by the river to run if they do so at all. Be prepared for staring...but it's not too bad since you pass them fairly quickly.
-Try to avoid the clouds of gas when they spray for mosquitoes. It makes your lungs feel pretty awful.
-Watch out for the stumbling drunks near restaurants.

Bets for how many times I go for a run before I hurt myself?

Hong Beop Temple: Tea Ceremony

2010-07-19T10:30:00.000-04:00

Sunday I went to Hong Beop Temple for their monthly cultural event for foreigners. Usually it's packed but unfortunately for the organizers, this weekend was also mudfest. Mudfest is a blast but how many times in my life do I really need to look like this?

Don't get me wrong, it's a fabulous look. For me, I think mudfest will remain more of a once in a lifetime experience. I do recommend the Boryeong mud soap. Counter-intuitive idea for cleansing but works wonders for the skin.

Back to the tea! First there was a lecture on Buddhist painting by Brian Barry, the first ever foreigner to join the Chogye Zen Order of Buddhism. He is actually very famous in Korea for his Buddhist painting, translating and Dharma instructing. Though the talk was poorly organized, I learned about some of the more technical and artistic aspects that I'd been curious about. English literature in the museums tends to just explain who is who in the painting, which Bodhisattva it is and what not. However, I want to know why it is there, what the colors symbolize, and so forth.

I'm not sure what a talk on Buddhist painting had to do with a zen Buddhist tea ceremony. I would have liked a talk about the actual ceremony or history...because while the demonstration was interesting it was not entirely elucidating and neither was the handout they gave us to read at home. I suppose I'll have to research it myself one day.

The women of the Tea Group entering to perform. Apparently their hanbok (traditional Korean dress) was designed on pre-Joseon (1392-1910)* dynasty hanbok...ie, very old. I love the simplicity of it though.

Can you spot the exit sign?

Okay the woman on the right is the host. She is the one who prepares everything for the ladies which is all very exact. Every motion (that anyone does) in this ceremony has a precise way to be executed. The woman on the left was not mentioned in my informational packet and thus I nicknamed the bitch of the party (in my head only!). I know, that is not very kind or PC but it's what popped into my head. Her position is to get everything from the host and pour it for everyone else...a bazillion times.

We got to practice the tea ceremony...only we were forbidden from taking pictures. Which kind of made sense since every motion was specified and there was meditation in between a few of the steps. Next they taught us how to do this super formal traditional bow that I've never actually seen anyone use but it looked cool. There was a separate (and complicated) chart explaining everything for the boys and girls. Look carefully at my eyes in these pictures...you can see how bewildered I am. Just imagine how I looked whenever I took a dance class for PE credit back in the day...

Did my eyes just get wider? Why yes, yes they did. See the complicated charts peeking out from behind the announcer? The only thing that frustrated me is that for the bow part they announced the Korean first and then the English instructions...at an event where the second part is advertised as Korean only and when presumably Koreans already know how to bow properly. Thus the bug eyed confusion as people responded to verbal cues I hadn't heard yet. Sometimes I understood the Korean though...and I will admit, I felt smooth. Or at least, less spastic.

Oh Alex, not quite! I did get lower but remember, I was watching to see what to do next. Thanks to A Connecticut Yankee in King Sejong's Court** for the pictures of my attempt at formal bowing.

Coming up...the Spaz goes for a run. Oh yes, a run.

*Apologies if I made any errors about the history/time period. I fact checked my dates via a Google search but we know how reliable the internet can be.
**Otherwise known as Shoesy in this post.

And the spaztastic continues...

2010-07-16T10:45:00.000-04:00

I opted not to go swimming with the rest of the students in school yesterday. I'd much rather work on my seemingly never ending pile of prep for summer camp (I take anal retentive preparation and perfectionism to whole new levels lately). The real reason was that, in a group of 600+ people I'm more helpless than the first graders since I can't follow the verbal directions or help lead the students. Originally, they were just going to have the music teacher watch the kids who stayed behind (broken bones, ear infections, etc) for the 4 hours that we had them. However, she is Really pregnant and I saw no reason that I couldn't help out and supervise for a couple of hours to give her a break. There was only one student who I don't teach, a tiny first grader who seemed slightly intimidated by the big kids and wacky foreign teacher but relaxed when I asked her what her name was in Korean and introduced myself. Having 10 kids watch Mr. Bean and draw pictures isn't exactly a taxing way to spend my morning.

On to the spazy part...

They ordered Chinese take out for lunch and stupidly I ate some fried, breaded looking pork along with my black bean noodle dish. I just didn't stop to think about how it was made. I was ridiculously sick for the next 20 hours, even with some prescription strength medicine. Nothing like teaching on a morning while nauseous and miserable and NO COFFEE. Ugh. Milk is evil. However, I was feeling better after lunch today and ended the day with some of my favorite 4th and 5th grade classes.

More spaz from yesterday:
For awhile in the afternoon I was alone in the teacher's room when the phone rang. I've been instructed that I can answer and then just say 'hanguk saram absaeyo' (there are no Korean people). Generally they say sorry and hang up or attempt to get the information from me using Konglish. Yesterday, I did my very best Korean '_____ Elementary School, teacher's room, sorry there are no Korean people' when the person on the other end of the line burst out laughing. It was the principal. He asked where the other teachers were (in Korean and English) but I really had no idea and sort of stammered that maybe they went to the bathroom. Today, he told the story at lunch and in the teacher's room a few more times much to our mutual amusement. It's nice when I can actually have a joking moment with the staff, even if it's at my spaztastic self.

Coming up: traditional tea ceremony and Dharma talk at Hongbeop Temple on Sunday. If you end up going, look for the girl tripping over her own feet and say hello!

Quick Spaz Update!

2010-07-15T02:42:00.000-04:00

On the way home from my GRE study group last night my mom called me. Normally, answering the phone does not cause bodily injury. However, when you slide your phone open and your rectangular wooden cell phone charm hits your eyeball with some force it does. So. Painful.

Me: Mom, hold on a sec.
~holds phone against stomach to muffle swearing~ F*CK OUCH GAH!!!!!!!!!! ~carefully return phone to face~
Me: Sorry, I'm back.
Mom: What happened?
Me: Somehow I managed to whack myself in the eyeball with my cellphone charm when I answered the phone.
Mom: ~Laughs~
Me: It really hurts! ~laughs too~

Further irony: the charm is something I bought at a Buddhist temple in China. It means happiness. Somehow, having it poke my eyeball was not how I envisioned that manifesting. Go figure.

Crime in Korea: The E-2 Visa Conundrum

2010-07-12T23:02:00.000-04:00

I was resisting posting about the increased E-2 visa regulations since the entire blogosphere seems to be writing about it. However, a comment made by Brent on Brian in Jeollanamdo restarted my interest in the subject. Essentially, he commented that as useful as it would be to have criminal background checks and drug tests done for all prospective teachers entering the country, that there will always be perpetrators who have no prior record committing offenses.

Gusts of Popular Feeling also made an interesting point, mainly that the reforms are being passed without any substantial statistics or facts backing up that foreigners are the ones mainly responsible for the crimes or that their crime rates are on the rise.

As well, when Choi did interviews to promote the bills last year, she announced that immigration had lost 22,000 teachers, but had used the wrong statistics, and never corrected her error. Instead of "an unemotional, logical review of the facts of the case," Choi's office used incorrect statistics, offered no evidence that "the crime rate among native English teachers is getting higher," and said something akin to 'I think I read it somewhere,' when asked for statistics regarding foreign teachers convicted of crimes being rehired - which are the main rationale (if you could call it that) behind the bills. Call me "angry," or "up in arms," but it's hard to get behind a bill like this when those who wrote it are unable to back up their reasons for it at all.

For me, I agree that ethnic Koreans who are currently exempt from the criminal background check laws should be included in them. People commit crimes across the ethnic scale. And yet, there will continuously be crimes from first time offenders, people who come from outside the schools and so forth.

Interestingly, the Korea Herald and the Joongang Daily has been focusing on the recent changes to make E-2 visa holder's life more convenient such as:

-The government will ease regulations to exempt foreign language instructors from having to submit documents and update their visas every time they change employers (...)

-Under the measures expected to go into effect next year, foreigners can join domestic Internet sites by using their foreigner registration number or passport number (...)

-The government will also change the current system requiring foreign suspects to provide prints of all 10 fingers every time they are investigated. Only their thumb prints will be collected from the second time,

(Quotes from the JoongAng Daily, "Work Visas Getting Easier for Teachers")
These are all useful things I suppose though only the internet one has ever effected me. It would be nice to be able to buy movie tickets online...

Alex goes zip-lining in Daegu...

2010-07-12T02:36:00.000-04:00

Friday I was sitting at my desk when my friend Silent Bob messaged me asking me if I had plans for the weekend. No? Well then I should go zip-lining with a bunch of people in Daegu at Herb Hillz. It wasn't too expensive (10,000 for the train round trip, 19,000 for the adventure). His group was planning on taking a bus from Nopo-dong but since there is a train station near my house I decided to just meet them there. Upon arrival in Daegue I call Silent Bob:

Me: So where are you arriving?
Silent Bob: Errr the bus terminal?
Me: You do realize that there are 4 intercity bus terminals in Daegu right?
Silent Bob:....Really?
Me: Could you read your ticket and see where your arrival is?
Silent Bob: ~pauses~...My ticket is all in Korean, I have no idea.
Me: ~face palm~ Does anyone with you read Korean?

We finally figured it out, met up and took a local bus south for about an hour to Herb Hillz.

Here is the thing about doing adventurous things in Korea--the safety courses will be in Korean. When I went bungee jumping in Seoul, there were enough foreigners that the staff just memorized the key phrases they needed. An hour south of main Daegu we were a little less fortunate. Luckily, between the girl who spoke semi-decent Korean and the girl who used to be a camp counselor we managed to figure out how to not kill ourselves. It was pretty visual anyways and we practiced the key safety moves on a mini ground level practice course before being sent on our merry way. I was much comforted by the fact that all of the safety gear was by Petzl, a well respected French gear company that makes fabulous stuff. I wouldn't have been so comfortable with safety gear made in say, China.

See that lovely face! You are definitely not supposed to hit the crash pad with your back but it took me a couple of times to figure out how to hit it with my feet. Mainly because I didn't realize that flailing a bit really does not help your flight path...

The things that didn't involve tarzan like moves and flinging yourself into the air felt like a cake walk...or rather, a wire walk...

The only thing that actually made me scream in terror is when we had to step on a snow board a glide on that through the air. Not the most secure feeling in the world.

See this? This is me being very bored. Despite the scariness of the snowboard (and the following obstacle, riding a bike across a wee little bridge). I managed to get right on and just do it....and then waited 20 minutes for the other girls in the group to work up the nerve. To be fair, it was pretty terrifying. However, I did have fun talking with Koreans and other expats walking by on the ground. The Koreans pretty much gave everyone universal looks of 'oh my god are you crazy?!' and then asked the usual round of questions.

Voila, my weekend! Today I am going to get bibimbap with the Partial Asian and then do the dreaded x...study for the GREs. ~shudders~

All pictures are care of Kevin Beale (or whoever he passed the camera to at that moment)--the only one of us who was brave enough to risk his camera. Knowing my spaztastic record, I definitely decided to keep mine in my locker.

Busan FM tonight!

2010-07-11T02:23:00.000-04:00

Hello all. As soon as my friend gives me the pictures you will get to see me on a ridiculous zipline adventure course that I did yesterday. Until then, I'm on the radio tonight at (90.5MHz) about 7:30 pm Korea time though the show starts at 7 with famous K-blogger James Turnball from the Grand Narrative, a blog focusing on gender relations and sociology in Korea. For those of you tuning in from outside of Korea, you can listen to it streaming after the fact.

After the show there will be a post show chat between the 3 of us live on KoreaBridge's webcast. Who knows? I mean if you have nothing better to do, it will be fun to laugh at me!

Spaz update: NONE! I managed to do everything yesterday without grievous injury. Assah!

The Exciting Life of an ESL teacher: 220 copies later...

2010-07-07T04:25:00.000-04:00

My life has had very little excitement lately. Mostly, I drink a lot of iced coffee, teach, and study for the GREs. In the two weeks before summer vacation starts my co-teacher and I decided to do a remedial phonics unit instead of starting a new chapter. The problem is that the previous 4 teachers insisted on only teaching the book--which has absolutely no phonics. That means that for the students who aren't inordinately bright or attending hagwons, they don't learn how to read though they might recognize some vocabulary words.

We decided to focus on the vowels since the students have a pretty decent grasp on consonant sounds. Today was 'A.' I basically tried to remember the best of phonics from when I taught at a hagwon last year, using my memory to recall similar exercises from a Scholastic phonics book. That's right, my 4th and 5th grade students are doing stuff that I taught kindergarten students. They had a lot of fun with it though. We ended the lesson by learning how to read a story and drawing pictures to go along with each page. I made an example (that we turned into a power point).I loved looking at the pictures though one student made his can a Hite beer can. I guess I know what his parents are drinking.

Spaz update:
I woke up this morning feeling like an absolute zombie despite getting 8 hours of sleep. I somehow managed to knock into my bed side table, trip over a pile of books and stumble over what I think was just my own feet. All of this in the short walk between my bed and the bathroom. No bruises or more permanent damage though so it's a win!

Busan Museum of Modern Art: What is Art?

2010-07-04T06:17:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, a friend of mine from my first year of college got to Busan. It was so strange to think about how different things were 6 years ago. He used to be one of my favorite people to sit next to in discrete mathematics and then linear algebra--mainly because his pockets were always stocked with gum and had no problem sharing his mid class snack with hungry 'ol me. I think he liked to sit next to me because I tended to draw cartoons and play strange word games with myself in the margins of my notes when I got bored. Sophomore year he transferred and we lost touch. This year we are in the city, half way around the globe from where we started and he is dating one of my friends from university when I was in Paris.

It's a small, strange world. Anyways, all future mentions of Shoesy refer to this guy.

We met up at the Busan Museum of Modern art which had a really interesting exhibit on modern Japanese, Chinese and (a smattering of) Korean artists. Some of it was derivative but most of it was intriguing and definitely worth visiting. A Korean surrealist, Lee In-hee, had this absolutely mind-blowing installation set up where you walked down this narrow, dimly lit hall with dark purple 'wall paper' and the sound of the wind blowing. There is a single light fixture illuminating the corner just enough to throw creepy shadows and then you turn the corner and see a framed screen where the wind is blowing through a field. In front of it is a desk, lamp and fish--all covered in this bizarrely British plaid and then there are a few more of the plaid fish half in the wall, as if they were jumping toward and away from the desk and were frozen the moment you turned the corner to see what was going on. There were a few other paintings by the same artist that were also interesting. It was reminiscent of the surrealism that Dali spearheaded and yet it felt fresh, modern and utterly unique.

I had a lot of fun talking about art with Shoesy who brought up the question 'what is art' in front of a stark panoramic photo of the museums surrounding Tiannamen Square. A common, age old question, and yet it provoked interesting discussion about what we liked and didn't like about the artwork and more importantly, why. Anyways, Cragon, Shoesy and I had a blast. Surprisingly there was information about the exhibit and a little about the museum available in English. Maybe they read the complaints about the dearth of English language information pamphlets for the Monet to Picasso exhibit.

Since Shoesy is a newbie we should have brought him to a traditional Korean restaurant...instead we hit the food court in the basement of Shinsegae around the corner for gyros. Whatever, sometimes a girl has got to have her Turkish.

On the way to Shinsegae we passed the Busan comic convention. It was hilarious.

Random life in Korea update:
I hate buying pads in Korea because 90% of the time the sales assistant hovers and tries to help you pick out a brand. I braved it today and unfortunately there was some sort of promotional deal. So not only did the woman completely ignore my pleas (in Korean) of 'really, it's okay' she pointed out things on various packages until finally I just grabbed one and tried to flee the premises. No such luck. She asked me to wait a moment and then got me a free pad sample of another type and a bright yellow, plastic Shrek mug. What does promoting Shrek have to do with my monthly cycle I will never understand.

Recording

2010-07-02T05:20:00.000-04:00

Recording the radio show was nerve wracking as hell and then it was over.

Spaz update:
1. Microphones are not fidgeting friendly. I had be reminded a few times not to rustle my papers or tap my fingers on the table. I finally settled for waving my fingers around in the air while I talked. Why yes, I did look ridiculous!

Rainy season has set in. I want to go out and be a tourist but when it rains I just want to hang about the apartment, read, and eat chocolate. Very exciting, I know.

Anyways, stay tuned for the radio show, Busan FM 90.5, "Let's talk Busan" on July 11th. It starts at 7:00pm Korea time (though I don't go on until 7:30) and should be available steaming on their website if you don't have access to a radio, or you know, Korean airwaves.

Irony and Busan FM

2010-06-30T01:36:00.000-04:00

So during one of my worst blogging months ever (in terms of the number of posts) I have some exciting news: Busan FM asked me to join them for a radio show interviewing a few foreign bloggers in Korea. I'm excited and a bit nervous. It's kind of funny because I don't even own a radio though I just checked out the website and a lot of it is available streaming.

Things I'm nervous about:
-Getting nervous and babbling.
-My co-workers listening to the show.
-The blog posts they've chosen to read/talk about.

The first one is a bit inevitable though I've gotten better about speaking slowly under pressure as a teacher. I normally wouldn't have told anyone about the show at work because I'm a little embarrassed by that sort of attention from anyone outside of my family. However, I had to let them know why I wasn't playing volleyball or going to the teacher dinner tonight after saying that I would go on Monday. They think it's super cool and want to know when it will be broadcast and the name of the show. Here is how the conversation with my head teacher went:

Head teacher: When?
Me: I don't know.
Head teacher: *Looks incredulous. Has the 3rd grade English teacher translate just in case we were miscommunicating.*
Me: No really, I have no idea.
Head teacher: Show name?
Me: I don't know.
Head teacher: *continued look of disbelief that I don't know any details surrounding this*

It's a kind of last minute thing, I found out that I might be doing it late Monday night and I just got the question list today.

The only thing that is legitimately worrying is if they read any excerpts from my blogs. In the beginning I tended to really, really ramble in a hyper fashion and get distracted by lots of shiny thoughts in the process. This is still true to some extent but I think I tend to stay more on task these days. Most of the time. I hope.

I'm going to go make soothing lists and read some newspapers. Thank god I only had to teach 3 classes today and am on top of grading and prep.

Wish me luck!

Konglish in Class

2010-06-28T02:40:00.001-04:00

My 6th graders have a huge government test in July, on everything they've learned in elementary school. The month of June has had identical lesson plans: dictation, practice test, go over practice test, give key sentences or flashcard making for homework. The only issue (for me) is that the government test is completely bilingual and very Korean heavy so it's very difficult for me to help teach. Basically, instead of our usual 50-50 balance, my co-teacher directs the class while I mark the homework and dictations, help keep students on task or help the low level/special needs students. Anyways, so I was grading today's dictations and I ran across some rather comical mistakes. It was necessary to suppress my giggles...

Actual Sentence: Does your mother work?
Student wrote: Does your mother wank?

Actual Sentence: I like red and blue.
Student wrote: I like rad and bar.

Actual sentence: Do you like fall?
Student wrote: Do you like fool?

Is it sad that they can't spell basic color words, of course. Is it hilarious at times? Absolutely.

On second thought, the mistakes aren't really laugh worthy but whatever. I get my kicks where I can.

Also, if you have time to kill, go check out my article over at Busan Haps, the Busan expat/tourist magazine.

Open Class with Parents in a Korean Public School

2010-06-25T22:49:00.000-04:00

Having an open class can be extremely stressful. A lot of it is out of your control: you can plan the perfect lesson but what if your kids get performance anxiety? What if your class starts late or early and throws off your carefully planned schedule? What if, what if, what if--all of those what ifs can drive you nuts. For the Korean public school teachers it can be even more stressful--the evaluations from parents and administrators will play a significant part in determining their pay scale. My co-teacher this year is new to teaching (and a fabulous natural) so I told her the essential thing about nailing an English open class:

It doesn't matter what actually happens. It just has to look good.

You'd think that having a 4th grade level English class would mean that everyone understands since most people were required to take over 10 years of English classes but this isn't the case.

In any case, it went down flawlessly. We basically took a standard lesson and made it glossier. Instead of black and white disposable game boards we printed color versions and had them laminated. The students we called on for the warm-up questions were students who we knew had loud voices and loved participating rather than the mix of levels we do in a standard class. Other than that, it was a completely normal lesson. And the parents loved it. Universally, they commented (my co-teacher translated everything for me afterward) that our energy was infectious--the kids loved learning with us. The parents loved how our acting everything we said made the class easy to understand and fun to watch. One mom said she was surprised by how fast the time flew by, 40 minutes seemed like nothing. And yes, I didn't see a single dad in a school full of mothers visiting.

I love teaching the 4th grade. They aren't jaded by learning yet or stressed out by overwork and exams. If you make it seem fun they will have fun learning. It makes my day when I get to chat with them in the halls or in the streets on the weekend. They are just so damned happy to be alive.

The only less than perfect thing that happened for the open class: my co-teacher and I accidentally wore the same color top again. Two open classes in a row we were very coordinated. I think that for the next one in December we might have to coordinate. Then again, Koreans are all about matching so maybe it was a good thing?

State Testing in Korea: Protest is Futile

2010-06-23T19:57:00.000-04:00

The JoongAng Daily published an article on Tuesday (...yes, I'm behind on blogging, what else is new?) about the recent actions of the teacher's union, "Union wages war on teacher evaluations, tests." Unfortunately, I think that the union is fighting a losing battle when it comes to protesting the nation wide tests. It's difficult to get students and parents to protest the tests with them when the scores will still be a central part of their applications to the next level of schooling (applying to middle school, high school and of course, college). Simply protesting the tests isn't efficacious. As terrible as 'teaching to the test' can be for schools it does allow a standard guideline for education across the nation.

I read an interesting teaching book lately that pointed out that for good teachers, students perform well on the tests, not because they were just teaching to the test but because they were teaching mastery of the subject material.

As for the teacher evaluation system, I don't really know enough to comment though the teachers I have spoken with seem unhappy with it.

Spaz update on life:
I had been getting constant upset stomachs this month. I finally figured out why: my vitamin C tablets are made with milk. Only in Korea people, only in Korea.

Long Over Due: Drinking with Co-workers

2010-06-20T02:01:00.000-04:00

I will never ever get used to the fact that it is not just socially acceptable but socially necessary to drink with your co-workers in Korea. The women tend to be very jealous that I don't turn bright red after a drink or two but mainly it's just a lot of fun. People aren't so embarrassed to try out their English skills after a few shots of soju and it's easier for me to be social. Anyways, we went to Moloondae (romanization??) and wandered around Dadaepo beach which is about an hour from Yangsan. It was nice to get out of the city and just walk around.

I could be teaching or doing lessons plans but nope! I got to spend the gorgeous afternoon strolling around and looking at this. It was kind of amusing, when other people passed us they always stared, pointed and talked about me (ooo waegook saram!). I don't think my co-workers realized what foreigners go through on a daily basis. They know the kids always give me lots of attention but somehow that's different.

Gorgeous, no?

I have about 10 more photos that I'd love to upload from the bar, the crazy light/water show and so forth but blogger is extremely unhappy with me today.

More updates this week, I promise!

Busan Haps 1 year anniversary and the World Cup

2010-06-15T03:24:00.000-04:00

I have lots of great photos from this weekend. I had planned on bringing my card reader to work and posting them during lunch time BUT it seems to have gotten swallowed by my apartment. This is probably an indicator that I should straighten up the tornado of books and such instead of taking a nap after work. Probably.

If I find it I'll go back and edit this post, if not, use your sparkly imaginations!

World Cup Part 1:
I decided not to go to the local stadium in Yangsan with most of my friends since it looked like rain (and it did). Instead, I went to a sam gip sal restaurant with some friends and made the Koreans very happy since we were all wearing red and supporting Korea in the Korea v. Greece game on the TV. Nothing makes sam gip sal taste better than cheering ajosshis and victory.

Busan Haps Issue Launch Party/1 year anniversary:
Technically it was a giant pub crawl but if I hit 6 bars and had just a drink in each I'd be much drunker than I'd like. Pub crawls are not designed for those under a certain body mass I think. The last event was at a swanky (for Busan) club, MurpII (terrible name) in the basement of the Novotel Hotel. The atmosphere inside the club was pretty good though the door people left a lot to be desired. I was ushered right in since I was on the list but a few people had issues getting in. Confession: as small and silly as it is, being on the list made me feel kind of cool. Not to mention that not having to pay cover is excellent. Standard over-priced drinks though the pina coladas I had were excellent and had a giant wedge of pineapple on the rim so I felt like I was getting some nutritional value out of them too. Something tells me that the massive quantities of alcohol negated most of that but whatever. Vitamins are vitamins!

Funny bits: as I was coming out of the (amazing Western standard clean) bathroom I saw a woman going around picking up trash and such...in an old school maid's uniform. I'm talking about the black dress and white frilly apron on an ajumma. It was seriously bizarre.

World Cup Part 2:
After listening to the bands for awhile and schmoozing I decided to join the rest of my friends in Kyungsang to watch the US v. England game. It was utterly bizarre to be in a pub that was completely packed until 6am. Usually the crowd thins out at 1 and again at 3 but I don't think anyone left Eva's until the game was over.

Confession: I'm not into sports, at all. My usual stipulation for accompanying significant others to sporting events is that I be allowed to bring a book. Except for games like water polo where there are lots of near naked bodies to ogle. And yet, when you are across the world from home, it's invigorating to be somewhere packed with people who are shouting and jumping with excitement. The energy is contagious. At least I know the rules for soccer.

I finally got home around 7:30 and dropped into bed until 1 in the afternoon. Definitely not something to do every weekend but fun for a rare adventure. Pictures later, possibly.

Using K-Pop to fight Communism

2010-06-12T02:08:00.000-04:00

The idea of using Korean pop music to as South Korean propaganda against the North is so ridiculously Korean and wonderful. At least it's not bombs. The Chosun Ilbo reported:

An official in charge of psy ops at the Joint Chiefs of Staff said no decision has been made so far. "It will take months to set up the big screens to use in psychological warfare operations and a wide range of contents will be shown," the official said. "I don't know whether songs by girl groups will be included, but there is that chance since pop songs were used in the past."

Brian in Jeollanam-do wrote a bit about it in "Shitty K-pop Groups to be used to torment North Korea." And while I agree that k-pop is pretty bad quality wise, the entirety of South Korea seems to be smitten with it. The Chosun Ilbo focused less on the music and more on the groups' appearance: "the revealing outfits worn by the performers and their provocative dances could have a considerable impact on North Korean soldiers." I think they are trying to tempt the soldiers but it has an enormous likelihood of backfiring. As much as the rest of the world scoffs at the propaganda mill in North Korea, it has a fairly strong grip on the society. It wouldn't take any work to make videos of the k-pop groups into proof the general moral degeneracy of the South.

In other news:

My mother board on my old Dell died again. Since this is the 3rd or 4th motherboard it's gone through I think there is something else wrong causing the repeated deaths. Instead of having Dell do another shit repair job on it I'll probably take it to the computer repair shop on my street with a translated note from my co-teacher or something. Then again, Korea is so tech savy I wonder if they'll be able to get parts for my ancient beast. Point being: picture posts will be even more sporadic than usual for the next few weeks.

Tonight is the one year anniversary of Busan Haps! Korea has been going NUTS over the World Cup and even though I've never even been cognizant of the event going on I've been kind of getting into it. I even scored a shirt at E-mart with Korea spelled wrong so I'm going to wear that out tonight to the giant Busan Haps party.

Blogging Ennui, Care packages, Life

2010-06-07T11:15:00.000-04:00

In the past three days I've started 3 different blog posts and have yet to get past the second line of any of them.

Here was my day:
1. Administer speaking tests.
2. Discover care package waiting for me at 4:30.
3. Play volleyball. Somehow manage to cut my thumb on my fingernail and bleed all over my shorts.
4. Go to post-volleyball co-worker dinner. Proceed to sit in near silence for an hour and a half. Ponder my to-do lists for the next week.
5. Get home. Give up on to-do lists and eat chocolate instead. Get in bed and poke the internet.
6. Feel guilty about lapse in blogging....voila.

Number 2 really did make my day. A friend of mine from college had asked for my address awhile ago and I figured she was going to send me a post card or something. Instead I got a totally rad necklace and letter! I can count on one hand the number of packages I've gotten in Korea. Usually, it's something I requested from my parents (like the chocolate from no. 5...). Obviously, this is excluding book deliveries. The women in the office seem to get a kick out of it actually. This is probably due to the fact that I end up squealing and bouncing a bit while diving into the box. Obscure classic Japanese fiction! Urban Fantasy! Reference books! Everything a good little bibliophile needs to keep happy. Anyways....the point is that the random little surprise package made me quite giddy. Without it, I might have actually gone insane over dinner.

Number 3 should really be a spaz update. Luckily I had a box of band-aids in my purse and didn't have to resort to asking my coworkers for help and feeling like more of an idiot than normal. I kept hoping it was just a little cut and would stop bleeding in a minute but then I got blood spots on my shorts and decided enough was enough and quietly left the practice drill to get a bandage. I doubt they missed my playing though I didn't manage to hurt anyone but myself today.

Blah blah blah. I must stop being so lazy after work. Perhaps tomorrow...

Why does my family so completely lack the athletic gene?

Fluency and Q-tips

2010-06-03T09:36:00.000-04:00

I will be the first to admit that my Korean is absolutely terrible. That being said, I can construct basic present, past and future tense sentences with my limited vocabulary and can generally make my way around with little trouble.

Today I was nearly defeated by q-tips. In a particularly spaztastic moment 2 days ago I managed to knock my q-tip jar over which promptly dumped itself into the toilet. Thank god there was nothing in the toilet but it was still a rubber gloved effort to fish them all out.

Note: my bathroom was obviously designed by a man. Inadequate and awkward bathroom shelving was not created with massive quantities of toiletries in mind. And I'm practically spartan compared to the amount I've seen Korean women bring on camping trips, let alone their home bathroom.

Anyways, so I popped into E-mart 20 minutes before closing thinking that I could grab juice, fruit, vitamins and q-tips and be on my merry little way. Oh no. I had to circle the toiletry section 3 times before I found the damned things. The entire time, all I could think is that fluency in a language is knowing how to say asinine things like q-tips. I finally found some in the eco-friendly section but I remember for a fact that I got my last bunch in a regular section for 50 cents.

Mini spaz update: I keep bumping my hips into my desk and other awkward furniture edges. I have interestingly shaped splotchy bruises on my hips that look really ridiculous with my bathing suit.

Next time: Alex goes on an adventure with her Korean co-teachers in which we wander the beach, bars and a light show. Now to upload the pictures....

Geoje Island and a Spaz Update

2010-05-30T19:45:00.000-04:00

Saturday morning I got up bright and early to make it into Busan for the 10:30 ferry. I whipped out my camera and prepared to be the world's best little blogger...only to realize that I'd left my memory card in my card reader on the table in my apartment. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Geoje Island is definitely worth the visit. I'd go so far as to say that tourists to Korea would do better to skip Seoul and just head down south to check out all of the craggy islands dotting the Korean coast. It's breathtakingly beautiful. I spent the day at Gujora beach, laying in the sun, building a sand castle (and yes I did get strange looks for that one), and picking up pretty shells. That night about 20 expats had a bonfire and roasted veggies and such over it.

Epic Spaz Updates:
1. Forgetting my memory card.
2. I'm sure there have been many updates related to ridiculous things I do before coffee. I am absolutely retarded before caffeine. As usual, I poured the second half of my coffee pot into my travel mug before heading off to work. No problem there, I didn't even manage to get any on my new white polo shirt (let's see if it lasts the day) and then I realized that there were white bits floating along the top. I opened the fridge again and sure enough my milk had gone bad. Aside from the travesty of wasting a cup of coffee made from freshly roasted Kenya beans was the fact that I had already had a cup of it with the sour milk and didn't notice. My stomach and bad milk are decidedly unhappy.

Cultural Juxtapositions in Korea

2010-05-27T10:27:00.000-04:00

I haven't been sleeping much this week--and I'm not one of those people who gets wildly creative when sleep deprived. Instead I tend to veer off of the deep end of my stranger tendencies. For instance: talking to my cups of coffee, muttering incoherently while I do mindless tasks, and color coding more voraciously in an attempt to ward off chaos, etc.

Now for the point of this entry: Saturday I went to Yonggun Temple (even though I'd been there before) to check out the Buddha's Birthday decorations and festivities. While walking along the cliffs, I saw a monk in front of me carrying a bag. This might not sound so strange, except that it was a Louis Vuitton bag. Not sure if it was real or not since I didn't get close enough to tell but how strange is that on a person who has supposedly given up material luxuries. I'm going to hope that he was carrying it for someone else....

Maybe it's not a monk. But he is wearing the furry-esque monk clogs and outfit. Who knows. In any case, it was very strange.

View from above. I love the lines of lanterns. I had more very cool pictures but blogger has made Mozilla crash no less than 12 times in the process of uploading these 4 and I give up. Dear Blogger, Sometimes you hurt my soul. Love, Alex in Asia.

A Visit to Chungnyeolsa Shrine in Busan

2010-05-24T10:06:00.000-04:00

Friday I headed over to Chungnyeolsa* Shrine in Busan. According to the pamphlet I got:

This shrine is dedicated to those patriotic Korean fighters who died resisting the Japanese aggressors during the Japanese invasion of Korea (1592-1599). The Japanese Invasion was an aggressive war which was designed by Hideyosi Toyotomi, who had unified the feudal domains of Japan, to satisfy his desire for expansion of territory and stability of political regime.

When is war and invasion not an act of aggression? In any case, the people in what is now known as Busan got their asses thoroughly kicked. At the end, women were even throwing roofing tiles at the Japanese soldiers and everyone died anyways.

On to the actual visit. The shrine is really peaceful and beautifully maintained. The hike up to the remaining fortress wall was closed off but I'm not sure for what as the only words I understood on the sign were 'no' and 'closed.'

I think I could only be more Korean here if those shorts were a mini skirt instead. But I digress. Doesn't the architecture strike as having a rather Chinese influence? It reminded me of structures that I saw in Beijing (though of course I can't remember precisely which).

'Hear me roar!'

Pretty view of the city from behind one of the gates.

Taking advantage of the shade.

For 200won (less than 20 cents American) it wasn't a bad way to spend an hour wandering around.

*'Sa' means temple but the translation says 'Chungnyeolsa (Shrine)' and it seemed more shrine like than temple like so maybe 'sa' sometimes means shrine?

Elections...of some sort in South Korea

2010-05-23T07:09:00.000-04:00

The past week has been full of people strangely dressed with matching colors, numbers, pamphlets and cards. Not to mention the trucks that go buy blaring advertisements for the candidates (during school hours next to our school) or building sized posters that get hung up (which makes me wonder how much they pay the businesses to go without natural light for days on end). I know that there is a big mayoral race going on in Seoul right now so I figured it's the same for the Busan/Yangsan area. I'm not entirely sure about the particulars though. I tried googling it but mainly Busan elections seem to merit a byline in articles about the Seoul elections.

Anyways, Thursday after work (and the start of a glorious three-day weekend, thank you Buddha's birthday!) I headed into town to get my soy latte fix at Coffee Jigi. After an hour or so of studying Korean and caffeinating myself, I walked down the street to meet people for dinner and this is the sight that greeted me:

You'd think that the road would be closed off for something like this--especially since it would be easy to reroute traffic in my neighborhood but oh no. There were trucks and lined up volunteers on both sides of the road. Can you tell that the women behind the men are doing more than clapping. There was a dance. I tried to film it but traffic is not conducive to home video production. I was also the only one running around taking photos of the volunteers lining the streets. Some of the volunteers looked confused, others amused, and I'm pretty sure I got a couple of eye rolls. The things I do for blog documentation!

Originally the 7 girls were just wearing their own mismatched flower visors but an organizer came over, distributed hats and took them away. I want a number hat!

Look! Police directing traffic and helping people cross the street!!!!!!!! I honestly wonder if anyone got hit recently during a rally that inspired this. It was nice though to relax about careening motor bikes, buses and cars all trying to run me down.**

Lots more to blog about the weekend with more pictures. Some of them even include my lovely mug! I think I"ll probably spread it out over the next couple of days since I promised my mother I'd finish rewriting her website already...

**My mother claims I am the most morbid person she has ever met. Considering the fact that I've posted a will on my blog twice I think she might have a point. However, I'm sure we could find someone more morbid than I am. Maybe. With much Google searching.

In Which I Go Utterly Overboard on Tourism in Busan

2010-05-21T08:55:00.000-04:00

I have spent the past day and a half going nuts with tourism and blog worthy photographs. Unfortunately, 12 hours of being on my feet mean that I have zero desire to actually edit, upload photos and write. So instead I will link you to an article I wrote for Busan Haps, the local print/web English magazine.

Article love.

This feels dangerously like self pimping only...it's a blog. And I'm not getting paid for anything, blogging, writing for the magazine, you clicking the link...therefore, I've decided it doesn't count.

Click. Don't click! Whatever you feel like doing.

My ligaments are currently unhappy with me. Obviously, this calls for ibuprofen, chocolate, a book, and a letter.

Dear Ligaments,
Please don't be so tender and sore.
Love,
Alex

How to find a random blog in Korea

2010-05-19T09:51:00.000-04:00

How do people find my blog? According to google analytics, lots of them go searching for 'Russian prostitutes.' I mentioned it once way back in the day and ever since then it has turned up in every monthly report. Occasionally they stay and keep reading for more than .01 seconds.

....That last paragraph will probably ensure that the Russian prostitute hits continue for another year. Good?

Honestly, I found most of my favorite blogs when I was desk warming this winter and desperate for things to read at my computer once I knocked out an obscene amount of lesson plans. So here is my wonderful guide for finding new ways to kill time!

1. Go to your favorite blog.
2. Click every single one of their links.
3. Click every one of their links.
4. Bookmark what you like.
5. Read everything they've ever written online.
6. Repeat as boredom allows.

I have my first public school open class tomorrow. I'm not terribly worried. I've done them before and the only people watching will be the other teachers at my school....very few of which speak English.

Failing to Find Geumjeong Mountain Performing Arts Festival...

2010-05-17T10:15:00.001-04:00

Usually I'm the over-prepared one of the group. Travel buddies groan at my detailed itineraries. Classmates used to beg me for my color-coded notes. Organization just helps me feel calm, especially since I get distracted so easily (remember when I sprained my ankle because I got distracted by something shiny?) There was a festival on Geumjeong Mountain yesterday that I thought would be oh so easy to find if I showed up in the general area.

Fail. FAIL. I never found it. I hadn't even written down the name of it (which obviously I couldn't remember) so I could properly ask someone where it was. However, I did manage to have a wonderful time wandering around. Normally I don't mind being lost in Korea. But I was trying to show some newly arrived people a good time and felt like I utterly failed. I mean they had good picture opportunities but a festival would have been the perfect way to kick start a trip in Korea.

I started off back at Beomeo Temple...which was completely wrong though i wasn't the only person looking for the festival from there.

All of those papers hanging down are wishes/prayers/hopes. So beautiful...and yet buying one is not QUITE as spiffy as making your own lantern. Just saying.

I finally made it to the right part of Busan...but I was about 4 kilometers from where I need to be. Look at the people passing by....decked out in hiking gear. The trail was easy enough to comfortably manage in my Birkenstocks for several kilometers. Oh well, this gate thingy that I found was pretty cool.

After walking a few more kilometers in the wrong direction we decided to wander back to Busan Station where the lantern festival thingy was supposed to end at 8 with a concert. The concert was...interesting but I didn't see any festival related to it. Maybe the lantern lights were it? Not terribly exciting.

My favorite part of the day: randomly discovering a public hot springs foot spa outdoors on the way from Geumjeong mountain to Oncheondong Station.

This is what normal people do at a hot springs bath after hiking around.

This is what I do. Got all of the Koreans laughing and smiling though. Oh the crazy foreigners. I did manage to sit still and enjoy the hot water though. Which was ridiculously hot. Look at how red my feet got after 5 minutes!

My skin is normally not the same color as my nail polish.

I love Korea. Where else in the world do you randomly find hot spring foot baths?

Korean Temples...sort of at Naewansa

2010-05-15T12:14:00.000-04:00

Now, I love seeing temples. But I feel the same way about Korean temples as I do Renaissance art--there are only so many you can see before you start getting a little bored of the same styles and subjects repeated over and over again. I can already hear the protesting rants but before anyone gets up in arms: I like Renaissance art and I like Korean temples but sometimes I want to see something dramatically different.

There is a tiny temple in between Yangsan and Tongdo Temple called Naewansa. I wasn't interested in seeing the temple...I just wanted to play on the rocks along the river like most people my age seemed to be doing in the area (Koreans too, not just foreigners). So that's what I did. I played along the rocks and then sat, sunned myself, and read this month's book club book (Snow Country by Kawabata). Of course, I managed to fall through a patch of land that wasn't as solid as it looked and jar my left ankle nicely. It's a little tender but doesn't feel like I re-sprained it and it's not swollen. Cross your fingers people.

Picture diary of my day:

Reasons to be glad you aren't a chicken: you don't live in a cage! Though I will admit, this cage is far bigger than the factory cages in the U.S. There was also a duck in there. I'm not sure if he flew in to hang out for awhile and get some free grub or if his wings were clipped.

This is me trying dongdongju for the first time. I know that it's weird that I've been in Korea for almost a year and a half but I honestly don't drink that often. It was okay, kind of a like a thicker version of makoli without the carbonation. The big pancake like thing in the middle of the table is pajeong, an omlette/pancake type thing made from eggs, onions, scallions, peppers and often baby octopus or squid tentacles. Yummy. I had been avoiding it since the last time I had it I was quite ill from what I suspect was milk or butter. However, my co-workers insisted that pajeong is NEVER made with milk or butter so something else must have made me sick. I was dubious but willing to give it another shot. Absolutely terrible decision on my part--I've been sick since late afternoon. Oh well, it was mighty tasty.

Play time for Alex! Sticking your feet in to cool off feels fantastic. I wish I'd worn shorts so I could wade better but it was a little chilly when I set out and I'd rather be too hot than cold any day.

Next time I shall do what these gentlemen did and bring my own food.

Though most likely, I will wander like this girl (squint!) alone and contemplate such important topics as how to pay for grad school without selling my soul or organs and how pretty the mountains are. Obviously the second topic is the preferred modus operendi. And it's not hard to focus on.

Wrapped up as I am in school and city life it's easy to forget how beautiful the country side of Korea can be.

Spaz update: (Aside from the ankle twisting)

Hot pepper Sun Chips were on sale today at E-mart. From the sign I was able to understand that if you bought 4 the 5th was free. What I missed was that I was supposed to put the items in this little plastic bag that had a barcode on it. I had elected to skip the bag thinking I'd save on some plastic since they were all going in my canvas shopping tote. At the register the young clerk couldn't ring it up because there wasn't a sale barcode. I tried to explain that it was the sale item and I think he understood me (I could have been saying something else of course with my typical ability to butcher the pronunciation into something indecent) so he called over another sales clerk to ask how much they were but the other guy was as baffled as he was. So they called over a THIRD person (managerial looking) who looked at me and kind of gave me the 'seriously' look and then told the boys to go get a bar code bag. They told me to wait a moment (in Korean) and I apologized and turned bright red. Turning bright red might not seem like a big deal but I only blush about once or twice a year. I think the fact that I'm just such a spaz on a daily basis makes it take a lot more to embarrass me to the point of actuallyblushing. Being lost or confused in the grocery store isn't something new for me in Korea but I think that understanding that the clerks thought I was a total fool pushed my embarrassment index over the edge.

2 minutes later at the pharmacy I was so flustered that I forgot the Korean word for 'peach' and had to try to point to the box of vitamins I wanted. At least the pharmacist was nice about it.

Mostly Koreans are very nice to me. For instance, when debating with my friend about which stop to get off at the man behind us on the bus told us he was getting off at Naewansa and would show us where to go. Koreans are generally awesome, sometimes I just fail.

Emergency Drills in South Korea

2010-05-13T04:01:00.000-04:00

The days I don't bring my camera with me to work are bound to be full of picture taking opportunities. Murphy's Law is brilliant that way. Anyways, as I was stumbling through my second cup of tea my co-teacher messaged me that our first class was canceled (huzzah!) for some in class drills. I figured this had nothing to do with me and cheerfully set about getting a third cup of tea and working at a leisurely pace on lesson preparations. An hour later, smoke bombs (of a mild variety) were set off in the school, an alarm went off and the loud speaker announced that everyone was to vacate the building. At least, that's what I presume it said. So I grabbed my cup of tea (oh the joy of travel mugs) and followed the squealing crowds of children out. After everyone was assembled (far too close to the school if there was ever a real fire or catastrophe) our attention was called to the student waving a blue cleaning rag out of the window. It was a simulation for what you should do if you don't get out in time. Then the two PE teachers rushed into the school, got her, and carried her out on a stretcher. I kid you not. They fake checked her over for a minute too. Next, the teachers assembled in the middle of the field to demonstrate how to use a fire extinguisher. Instead of just using them they decided to practice on a real fire. So they gathered together some cardboard boxes and lit them on fire. The children were highly entertained. After all of that, everyone went back inside presumably to continue the workshop. I went and got another cup of tea and got back to lesson prep. Except that everything smelled pretty badly for an hour it was a nice diversion to my usual routine.

Speaking of catastrophes, go and read Mr. Awesomecool's evaluation of the quality of Korean construction. He worked in construction for awhile in the US and knows quite a bit about safety standards.

Tonight, bibimbap with the Partial Asian and SLEEP. Hopefully. I haven't been sleeping very well lately (yes, I know all of the caffeine isn't helping) and it's making me start to approach zombie land again...

Education got rid of poverty in Korea?

2010-05-12T20:10:00.000-04:00

Today's Korea Times ran an article entitled 'Education only way to get rid of poverty.' Now, education plays an enormous part in helping a country advance but only concentrating on education in a developing country is ridiculous. The article did make a good point about better emphasizing educating women (from Hilde Johnson at UNICEF):

Higher educated women tend to marry late and have fewer children. They are very aware of hygiene and health issues that surround their family and know exactly what they should do.

Education is great but without strong energy policies, getting even basic electricity or running water to schools can be a challenge. Families can't afford to send their children to school if they need the child as a wage earner or laborer for the family farm. Education policy is one facet of successful development policy. Without a more complex, comprehensive plan it's completely ridiculous to say that 'only education eradicates poverty' in the context of the developing world.

Korea's rapid development had a lot more to do with subsidies to get fledgling industries off the ground, comprehensive infrastructure, agriculture reform. Education was just one part of the plan. I'm not saying that it's not important but education can't be effective without other factors.

Hong Beop Temple: Lantern Making and Epic Spaz Attack

2010-05-10T10:23:00.000-04:00

On March 21st, I went to Hong Beop Temple to learn about Dharma and try out traditional calligraphy. It was a pretty cool way to spend my birthday. Anyways, this month's program was a Dharma talk and traditional lantern making for Buddha's upcoming birthday (May 21st). The Dharma talk was given by an American monk who was currently visiting an international meditation center in Busan. Even though he gave the same basic message as the last monk, the delivery was completely different. He was trying to really get across the point of being in the moment--that meditation isn't just about sitting still. It's in everything you do. When you are walking, just walk, when you are eating, just eat. Concentrate on what you are doing fully and 'just do it.' Very good message though he did end up sounding a bit like a Nike commercial. It would be hilarious (and also scandalous and ten kinds of wrong) if they had a zen master for the next ad campaign.Anyways, Here is a paraphrasing of one of his anecdotes that I really enjoyed:

A few hundred years ago in China, two monks are traveling between temples one day on a rather long journey. Following their customs, they do not talk and are just walking along. Eventually, they come to a stream that is engorged because of recent rains. On the bank is a maiden who is distressed about trying to cross the dangerous water alone. One of the monks picks her up, carries her across, puts her down on the other side and continues on his way. Many hours later, just before they reach the temple, the other monk says to him 'you know in my temple it is forbidden to even touch a woman and you picked one up!' The first monk replies 'I carried her across the stream. Are you still carrying her?'

His point was that if you are free from attachments you are truly free to help people. Anyways, there were lots of interesting things said. I will never be a Buddhist but I think that the religion has quite a good deal to offer people. As the positive aspects of many religions do. But I digress! Back to the temple.

Apparently, they were in the midst of running a week long camp for little boys to be like 'real monks.' They shaved their heads, gave them monk clothing and treated them like real monks for the week. That included not touching their heads (or much touching in general) and waking up at 3am. I hope the little tykes got an afternoon nap. They were unbelievably cute. Even the Koreans at the lecture were cooing over them like mad. Of course, I've never seen a grown-up monk run or play frisbee but I'm glad they got to relax a bit.

They even took part in community work. Notice how the boy on the far right is nearly hidden by his wheelbarrow.

So making lanterns with delicate paper takes incredibly advanced motor skills. Notice how they have one helper per child? The kids did seem to have an inordinate amount of fun painting the glue...and their sticky fingers.

Eee! Sticky fingers! Put them together...and pull...together....apart...STICKY AMAZING GOODNESS! .... That's what I imagined they were saying. That's just me though.

At the moment, I can hear my Mother going, "Yes, yes the miniature monks are very cute but WHERE ARE THE PICTURES OF YOU?!" I will not disappoint the mother unit even though I have helmet hair from riding Female Kiwi's motorcycle.

And yes, that is my yellow notebook which goes with my everywhere. How else would I be able to paraphrase random Dharma stories so well? Sadly, I filled it up this afternoon and will have to transfer to a new purse notebook. This wouldn't be a big deal only I keep ongoing lists in the back few pages on things to check out when I have a change. I COULD cut them out and put them in the new notebook only it's a different size and it would just offend my OCD sensibilities.Errr, tangent gun!

Finally, the finished product!

Aren't they pretty?! I will (possibly) put candles in them like I'm supposed to on Buddha's birthday only I'm pretty sure I'd accidentally burn down my apartment so for now they will be strictly ornamental. The lotus flower one is suppose to have 5 rows of 13 petals each (of the pink) but they didn't have quite enough petals to go around and to be honest I got pretty sick of gluing things after 3 hours. The munchkins only made the simpler lantern. Now I'm sure you are wondering how on earth I got home two fairly delicate paper lanterns on the back of a motorcycle. Here's how: I put the purple one very carefully into my amazing expandable North Face backpack (brought along just for this purpose) and begged my other friend to carry home the lotus one. For carrying home several extra lanterns (I wasn't the only one taking an anti-lantern mode of transportation home) on the subway she deserves a medal. At the very least, I think crappy movie night dinner will be my treat on Wednesday.

Spaz updates...just from the past 3 days:
1. Female Kiwi said that she's never been close to having an accident...until that ride with me. On the way their we had to swerve to miss another cyclist heading the WRONG WAY down our lane, a car that peeled out without looking both ways, and a truck changing lanes abruptly without signaling. Riding was very fun but I think my luck might be hinting at something. On the positive side, we didn't die!

2. Saturday I said 'crick' instead of 'click' and later 'tower' instead of 'towel.' I have officially been in Korea for FAR TOO LONG. Dear Summer Vacation, Please come faster! Love, Alex

3. While helping my coworker put up the poles for the volleyball net, the handle for adjusting the tension fell off, whacked my thumb and sliced it open. I'm serious. Not only did I bruise it, I actually started to bleed a bit. The PE teacher had to go get a bandaid and everything. Then again, I didn't hit myself or anyone else in the head during practice so maybe it's a good idea to get out my spaz magnet before volleyball starts.

4. I forgot that I was wearing my indoor slippers outside on the way to volleyball until I slid on the steps outside (no traction!) and nearly face planted...in front of a few parents waiting for their children. I managed to save myself at the last minute....but it was a close call and definitely still ridiculous looking.

There are a few more minor ones but I think I'll save them for tomorrow's post.

Updated Will

2010-05-08T22:28:00.000-04:00

Today I'm riding on the back of Female Kiwi's motorcycle to Hongbeop Temple, about 20 minutes away. She is a very responsible driver and I'll be wearing a helmet...but let's face it: Disaster follows me. Just in case we wipe out and die, here is my updated will:
1. My books should go to the Hemingway lending library.
2. My ancient computer shall go to my mom...because it's still less ancient than hers.
3. Hooligan 1 can have my coffee pot and toaster oven.
4. Partial Asian can have my iron...and the rest of my amazing Swiss chocolate.
5. My ipod will go to my mom.
6. My Harry Potter Books go to Vanessa.

This is so morbid. Oh well. Drive safe Female Kiwi!!!!!!

Fickle Women and Korean Class!

2010-05-07T08:35:00.001-04:00

To change up the Korean class routine, last week we learned a Korean pop song that was apparently very big last year. It's essentially about how fickle this Korean girl is about her feelings for a man. We went over the lyrics first and then listened to the song. This girl, Jang Yun Jeong totally ripped the Israeli/Jewish (not entirely sure where it came from) tune from 'Havah Nagillah.' It's HILARIOUS. Watch and see!

Will doing endless cutting for class prep this afternoon I watched/listened to the video about 50 times to practice. I can't wait to sing this song at Noraebang (Korean karaoke)!

Children's Day and Children's Suicide

2010-05-06T00:10:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, I guzzled my cold medicine, put on my sandals, packed some kim bap and headed to the BEACH. It was about 23c here yesterday, definitely warm enough to sit in the sun, chat with friends and read my book. Lots of the other people were drinking but cold medicine and drinking is a recipe for disaster. Two of the guys brought their guitars and improvised songs about Children's Day and being on the beach while highly amused Koreans looked on.

It was amazing to see so many young people with their family and smiling. They clutched balloons and candy and ran around to their heart's content. Of course then we had the lovely reminder article today in the Korean Herald about how frighteningly high suicide rates are among the young. Every few months someone runs an article about how Korea has the highest suicide rate in the OECD and talks about why this is so. And yet no one ever really talks about how to help...

Zombie Attack!

2010-05-04T05:56:00.000-04:00

Really, today a zombie took over my body and replaced bubbly, happy teacher with lethargic, dizzy, congested, coughing teacher. Oh wait, that was exactly how I've felt for the past week. Obviously, it's been a zombie all along and not just a cold. All I have to say is thank god for my co-teacher, who took over the bulk of the classes today while I alternately checked homework and swayed dizzily. Note to self: cold medicine and coffee really doesn't mix so well.

Why I am ending my sick hiatus if I still feel stuck in zombie land? Because I'm procrastinating doing my French homework I think I shall gorge myself on Swiss chocolate (I LOVE YOU MOM/DAD/KAREN!!!!), have another cup of ill advised coffee and get to work. I know, I know, I should be resting it's just that there is so much to do and only so many hours to do it in. Tomorrow I don't have any work (Children's Day!) so I plan on lounging on the beach, reading a book, and dozing in the sun. Next to my box of tissues, medicine, and sunblock of course!

Temp Blogging Hiatus

2010-05-01T08:09:00.000-04:00

The internet in my apartment is broken. I tried buying a new cord and everything. Ideally, this will take until Monday or Tuesday to resolve but in case it doesn't, you know where I've gone!

Also, I'm ridiculously sick. Sicker than I was during the week. Yucky deep cough, congestion the works. I went back to the pharmacy for more decongestant and decided to get those yummy vitamin C chewable things my kids are always giving me. I was like uh 'bitamin** C...candy?' And mimed chewing. The pharmacist smiled but he got it! Last time I bought vitamin C it was in the pill form and who wants that when you can have candy?! Exactly! No one! Well, except maybe for diabetics.

** There is no 'v' sound in Korean but the word for 'vitamin' is the same.

All I want to do is lie in bed and poke the internet but my internet is broken!!!!!! Right now I'm at a PC bang (room) catching up on 3 days worth of emails. 5 of my students are sitting behind me and are very happy to see me. I live living in the same neighborhood as my students, it's fun to see them outside of school. I think it also makes the teachers seem more human.

Also, one of my student's dad's who is watching over them while they play bought me a coffee. Which is really sweet...only it is the instant Korean coffee which has milk in it. I think I shall stealthily wait until his back is turned and then dump it out in the sink.

More posts when I feel less like death warmed over and more like a human.

Trash and more trash!

2010-04-29T06:30:00.000-04:00

Trash 1: Kang Shin-who strikes again with absolutely TERRIBLE JOURNALISM. The Korean Rum Diary already ripped him a lovely new one but in short: Kang completely glosses over the underlying issues of corruption in Korean bureaucracy--particularly in education, in order to bash on two foreign students who apparently don't speak Korean very well.

Trash 2: The crap in my lungs. Usually colds start in my head and end up in my lungs. This one started completely in my lungs and only led to mild congestion after the initial 36 hours of coughing. Nice, deep, wet, and painful coughs. Oh the joys of being a teacher.

Trash 3: The Cheonan. Okay, so this isn't trash per se but the boat is now. All of the civil servants in the country (including teachers) wore black ribbons today and there was a minute of silence at 10am. It was actually an amazing way to start class, my students were super focused after a minute of having their eyes closed and pondering tragedy. The expat community seems increasingly nervous given the mounting evidence that the explosion was the result of a direct attack. I'm ambivalent. It was a horrible tragedy but I doubt that it's going to escalate into a full blown war. North Korea simply doesn't have the funds--or even the food to sustain any sort of major military procedure.

Trash 4: Bumping into something sharp and ruining my new stockings. A bruise AND trash. Oh the joys of being a spaz.

Teachers to Teach!

2010-04-27T06:02:00.000-04:00

I've only been working in the public school system since December but one of the only complaints I ever hear from Korean teachers is that they wish they didn't have so much paperwork. Teachers are required to do so many administrative tasks that they often have very little time to prepare for their classes--even with staying late, coming in early and taking work home.

The Korea Times reported today that the government is hiring approximately 3,000 "teacher interns" for the fall semester and 10,000 more by next year (remember, the Korean school year starts in February). There is also a move to reduce "required administrative documents by 50 percent." My original belief is true! Half of the paper work teachers are forced to do is bullshit! I'm so glad that no one in the upper echelons of the administration is willing to make paperwork in English...all I have to do is work on lesson plans and preparation (which is time consuming!).

At the end of the article there was a brief mention of the new evaluation system being put into use though specifics were lacking (what a surprise). It will be difficult to gauge how the evaluation system affects foreign teachers.

I think it's a fabulous idea though I'm willing to bet that the bulk of those will be sent to urban schools and that the schools in more rural and even suburban(esque) environments will miss out, at least in the beginning. I'm also weary about the lack of training. I mean, the government invested thousands of dollars to get me here...and gave me precisely one week of training. The same training wasn't given to anyone in my school or my co-teacher and a lot of it was difficult to reiterate. It also failed to cover the nitty gritty bureaucratic details--probably because they differ widely between schools and districts.

Anyone at a school with one of the new "teacher interns?"

Life and BusanHaps

2010-04-26T09:21:00.000-04:00

Okay, I went from posting 6-7 days a week to 3 to practically none this week. Reform must happen! I just have a ton on my plate at school lately and my personal life is slowly sorting itself out which shall hopefully lead to more regular posting. I SHOULD be working on a different writing project this evening but instead I vacuumed my apartment, dusted, and did the dishes. At least I was productive!

(Stupid) Secret:
I am now a writer for BusanHaps, an English language magazine on what's happening in Busan. Why is this a pseudo/stupid secret? Shouldn't I have been shouting the news on my blog? That's what bloggers do right? They self pimp do an almost disgusting level. And while I told my close friends about it...I felt (and feel completely embarrassed) by it. First of all, I'm never satisfied with anything I write. At all. Ever. I officially have the Sarah Lawrence complex of doom where I'm convinced that unless it's been through 600 edits, 10 billion rewrites and is 30+ pages long (okay, not always the last one) it's terrible. And even when I've put myself through all of that I'm still convinced it could be better. To the point where I agonize over writing and it isn't fun anymore. Another reason I didn't talk about it on the blog: my article isn't on the website from the latest issue. All of the print ones don't seem to be up yet (or maybe they are cutting some?) and whatever the reason, I take every excuse to assume that I'm terrible!

Sunday I went back and forth about 20 times over whether or not to attend the writers meeting for the upcoming issue. I finally convinced myself to just do it and as a consolation/braveness prize (or cowardice prize?) I bought myself a lovely soy vanilla latte at Starbucks before I went. It was worth it. The writers meeting was fun and it was a blast to brain storm, get feed back from my editors AND get assigned article topics for the upcoming issue. I walked out of the meeting feeling like I was on cloud nine...until I realized that I had gotten the date of my first webcast mixed up and I COULD have stayed in town later instead of rushing home right after.

Goal of the month: to stop being so hard on myself.

Warning Signs: Sparkles Ahead!

2010-04-21T08:33:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, at E-Mart something shiny caught my eye...and I put it gleefully into my cart. I mean, doesn't EVERYONE wish they had a pair of teal, zebra-striped shoelaces? For 1,000 won (under a dollar) I could brighten up my slightly woe begone chucks.

After taking off my work clothes today I figured it would be a perfect time to try them out...and realized that it is quite possible that I've been in Korea for too long. WHO ON EARTH PUTS SUCH STRANGE THINGS ON THEIR FEET?! Koreans do!** It's kind of fabulous and yet very frightening at the same time. Like seeing my adult coworkers wear rhinestone, Hello Kitty slippers in the hall.

(They aren't tied up all the way to the ankle for a reason...Korean shoes need to be easy to slip on and off since you generally don't wear them inside.)

My friend, Cowboy Batman, said that his moment came when he "realized [he] owned two ties that had sparkles in it."

I am very ready for summer vacation.

**I don't think it's bad that Koreans often wear bright, sparkly things-- I'm just finding it strange that I'm starting to want to wear them too...

Beomosa Temple Stay: In Which I Act Like a Monk

2010-04-19T07:48:00.000-04:00

When I told my friends that I signed up to do a temple stay they thought I was a bit nuts. Not because you pay to wake up at 3am or sleep on the floor but because I am absolutely terrible at sitting still. Terrible. I am a champion fidgeter. I surprised myself at my ability to hold still...except for the need to shift my legs every few minutes. Sitting cross legged for any length of time is extremely painful. However, I don't think I shifted my legs more than the other foreigners.

I'm not sure if large groups of foreigners have ever booked a temple stay all at once. Busan Meet-up group organized 20 people for the weekend which was apparently enough of an event for a reporter to trail us all weekend, taking photos and notes in addition to the volunteer who takes pictures for the Beomosa website. I'm fairly immune to having my picture taken by strangers at this point but it was a bit strange to have it done while meditating.

The entire experience was surreal. As soon as we arrived, everyone changed into a pajama like outfit that we stayed in for the next 24 hours. We were really lucky to have a translator. Salsa Boy did a temple stay last year without one and it was a bit tricky to follow along with all of the rules and customs. And yet the spoken parts were only a fraction of what went on. So much of it was just about observing yourself, the world around you and thinking about...whatever needed to be thought about.

Everything was just overwhelmingly peaceful. Exhausting but serene. It's difficult to describe.

This is me, in my pajama like outfit, sans makeup or hair styling. We were waiting for everyone to get changed and settled. The boy behind me is in fact passed out, using a rather large novel for a pillow.

Even though most of the trees are still bereft of leaves the flowers blossoming on the cherry blossom trees (and whatever this pink variety) were stunning.

Lovely door painting.

I have yet to go to a temple and not taken at least 30 photos of the ceiling and rafters. At least I don't post them all!

I've seen the big drums at all of the temples but I didn't realize that they were still in use. They are played before the night time service and at the 3am service (at least those are the times I got to witness it). It was AMAZING. Several people played before it was over. When it was a new monk's turn he started off on the side while the other monk kept going so that there was no interruption of sound.

Around the temple complex.

The best thing about waking up at 3am is that you are sure to catch the sunrise.

So, how do monks eat? Very carefully, very precisely, and with absolutely no waste.

Totally vegetarian and actually far yummier than it might look. The bowl on the top right with the water is used for cleaning the other bowls when you are finished. Whatever water is leftover at the end of the meal is collected, and if there are any food particles in it the entire row of people/monks has to drink it. Their philosophy is (basically) that so many people in the world go hungry, the least we can do is try not to waste what we have.

Passing around the side dishes, silently. No talking during Buddhist monk meals!

The view from the top! We climbed up a mountain to the visit the hermitage for a meditation session.

It never ceases to amaze me how pockets of city sprout up in between the mountains everywhere here.

Good-bye pseudo monks! Even us monks have to make a call occasionally.

Serve!

2010-04-14T08:16:00.000-04:00

I few weeks ago I mentioned that I finally joined the teacher volleyball game on Wednesdays and the volleyball workshop on Mondays for the athletically challenged. On Monday I walked away with matching lumpy bruises on my wrists from learning how to 'dig' properly but had yet to complete a successful serve...even from the handicap line. I did manage to hit a few windows though. At least I didn't break anything. Today I actually served and got them over the net from the REGULAR LINE. Not just once but about half of my serves were successful. My coworkers shared my glee and high-fived me over the serving success.

We might not be able to communicate very well but joining the weekly volleyball events has helped me feel like part of the staff instead of the strange English monkey. I get more enthusiastic greetings in the hallway and the people who speak a little bit of English make more of an effort to try out their phrases on me. It makes life less lonely. Not to mention it means that I get to stop working at 3 instead of 4:40 on Wednesdays.

Spaz update: I definitely jinxed myself yesterday. I managed to hit both myself and my co-teacher in the face during volleyball. Not at the same time (though wouldn't that be an impressively spastic feat) and thankfully I didn't break her glasses or cause any bleeding. I would feel more terrible about this if she hadn't managed to hit herself in the face twice later in the game. Spastic English teachers unite!

I love my life.

In Which I DON'T Look Like a Deer Caught in Headlights

2010-04-13T08:23:00.000-04:00

In Korean class, I like (to try) and show off. It has nothing to do with my classmates and everything to do with the fact that I'm ridiculously competitive in all things academic. I will risk making mistakes in order to participate fully and try to express myself. I will experiment. I will be bold.

This is me in a store or wherever when asked a question in Korean in a real life situation:
1. Open eyes wide.
2. Stammer
3. Picture the flashcard, worksheet, lesson in which I learned how to answer this....and blank. Completely.
4. Stammer apologies some more.
5. Give up and/or gesticulate wildly to try to make them understand.
6. Feel desperately embarrassed that I've been living here for over a year and often fail to answer simple questions.
7. Walk away and berate self to study harder.

I've been getting better though. I try to rehearse in my head the questions they might ask me before I go into stores and how I can respond. I repeat the answers to myself a few times before I go in and take deep breaths. Today I had not one but TWO successful conversations in Korea. And by conversations I mean mini dialogue type things but STILL. Listen to what happened at the dry cleaners (translated):

Me: What day do I come back?
Man: What day is it today?
Me: It's Tuesday.
Man: ~counts on fingers~ Friday.
Me: Friday? (just to make sure I heard right)
Man: Yes, Friday.
Me: Thank you! Goodbye!
Man: Goodbye!

I've been going to the dry cleaners for months and EVERY TIME before today I butchered this conversation. BUTCHERED. I've known the days of the week since last October. LAST OCTOBER and I still would go all wide-eyed deer when faced with having to communicate what I needed. I felt giddy when I left the dry cleaners just because I managed to ask what I needed without giving or receiving blank stares when I bungle simple phrases into unintelligible Korean.

Spaz update: NOTHING! I haven't tripped over anything in DAYS!! In volleyball practice yesterday I didn't even get in the face OR hit anyone else in the face/head.Of course, I've probably just jinxed myself miserably but I don't care! La la la! ~Happy Dance~

....Did I mention how much I love spring weather? Expect similar giddy posting as the sunny days continue.

I went into the grand opening of a new makeup store in Yangsan before my French lesson (Innis Free!) and managed to say, no I'm don't need foundation I already have Innis Free foundation! Not just that, for the first time I filled out my own point card application instead of them taking my ID to get information and doing it for me. It wasn't even a bilingual sheet!

None of this is exactly challenging vocabulary but when you think about how frustrating it must be to not accomplish basic tasks without looking like an absolute fool or getting outside help you realize how good it feels to be able to do it successfully on your own.

Banning: Games!

2010-04-12T08:08:00.000-04:00

Okay, as much as I mock the need for this I think it is a pretty good idea to ban kids from the huge internet games after midnight. For details, go read the Korea Herald article here.

I think it's missing the bigger problem: where the hell are the parents when the kids are getting online at 12pm? Don't they notice the zombie like attitude their children take on from sleep deprivation? It's fairly simple: don't let them have a computer in their room. If their phone has advanced internet capability (a fair chance) have them hand it over before bed time/homework time. If they are sneaking out onto the family computer at night and you are a heavy sleeper---password protect it or put a locking program on it that only enables use during certain hours.

Good initiative government but maybe you should offer some parenting classes too.

Crashing your car to be polite

2010-04-09T04:46:00.001-04:00

I've been feeling blue lately. Some people are amazingly creative and productive artistically when they are down. I am not one of those people. I need to be happy or at least vaguely content to be productive. Otherwise, I tend to sit around my apartment and reread books for the 125th time. Mainly, I'm missing my family which is unusual for me. I mean, sure I'd like to see them more often but usually I'm content with being able to calling them. It's just that I have a brand new nephew who I'd love to meet and play with...and won't get to until he's nearly a year old.

Basically, this means I have zero desire for original content. Thus, I have yet another story that the Cragon told me.

I called Cragon to see if he was in for going out with the Yangsan crew for a night on the town in Busan. As I was hashing out the details he suddenly exclaimed:

Cragon: "OH MY GOD! I just watched a car crash!"
Me: WHAT?? Are you serious? Is anyone hurt?!
Cragon: No....~starts laughing~
Me: Wait, why is this funny?

The driver was a new teacher at his school, who upon seeing the principal walking toward her down the street, gave a deep bow of respect. In those few seconds, she somehow lost control of the car and veered onto the sidewalk. Normally, this wouldn't be a problem, after all, Korean drivers often use the sidewalk as parking area. However, in school zones they are fenced off (to help keep the children safe I imagine) with pretty sturdy metal poles. The poor teacher managed to completely crunch the front end of the car AND pop a tire.

Sometimes, a quick head nod really will suffice. For instance, when in charge of a moving vehicle.

Update/Edit/Reminders from Cragon on things I forgot about: The principal kept on walking after she crashed the car...and didn't stop to ask if she was okay. Apparently he mainly had a 'what on earth?!' look on his face. Cragon claimed that because she was a very new teacher he might not have realized that it was her/recognized the car so he might have just thought it was an incredibly spastic woman.

Also, in an attempt to get her car off of the main road (roads are very narrow here...so she was blocking traffic) she had to drive it about 500 feet in Cragon's direction...with the popped tire making lovely thumping noises the whole way. And probably ruining her axle. Though, to be fair, with the crunched front end of the car a ruined axle was probably the least of her worries.