Saturday, December 13, 2008

Sweet Jane

I just read a blog of note, tangobaby (http://tangobaby2.blogspot.com/), and she was talking about music a few posts ago and about getting songs stuck in her head. Lately, I get children's songs stuck in my head for days. 10 little indians, Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer and so forth. Usually I counteract such atrocities by listening to wonderful things on my ipod non stop but I haven't been listening to much music lately. I can see a few jaws dropping at this already, Alex, not attached to her ipod???? The thing is that on the way to work I have two options, I can listen to music and stare out the window and watch for my stop or I can read a book and listen for the Korean announcement telling me where to get off. The latter is more productive and good practice for my Korean. Same thing on the way home. In my apartment I usually can't be bothered to hook up my external hard drive to get my music going and my ipod loses out after a couple of hours when my ears hurt from the headphones. Do I miss music, of course I do. I just tend to ignore the fact until it snowballs onto me like it did today. At the moment I'm on a Velvet Underground kick, a craving started by tangobaby mentioning it.

Last night on the way to dinner with the Frenchies I passed through this center, and though I didn't realize it at the time, it's apparently The place to go to get instruments in Korea. Anyways, walking through it, already late to dinner I started dragging my feet and drooling over the violins. There was somone playing a scale on the violin so absolutely terribly out of key that normally I might have covered my ears and hurried on my way. I actually slowed down more and my heart felt like it was being squeezed and filled simultaneously I wanted to play that much.

95% of the time I'm really happy I'm not playing my violin at the moment. It was really hurting my body and taking away from the time I had to do anything else. I wasn't living and it wasn't what I wanted to do with my life so it seemed absurd to designate such large portions of my day to it. For the first time since I stopped playing I wanted to play again. I have time though my neighbors would probably kill me. The funny thing is I don't even have room in my apartment for a violin, to store it anyways. I miss my violin again. I love music, I might not be very good but it's part of my soul. My violin nursed me through adolescence and soothed my spirit, my mind. I could be crying when I started playing and happy 5 minutes later. When I played her, we were one thing, one being struggling through a song, working on mastering something together.

It's sounds cheesy beyond belief. Maybe I'll rent one or something while I'm here. Who knows.

1 comment:

Chris said...

Well if you were to ask me I'd say that a little violin now and again is a good thing just because I find music very therapeutic and sometimes I just need to sing. I know singing is a bit more convenient of a instrument to carry around but I think if you have an itch, scratch it. You don't need to play it the amount you did before you stopped. But I think its a good thing to keep going. I miss the clarinet and wish I was playing the piano and guitar more often. I just never had the patience to practice when I was younger and thought that results would be more immediate than I was seeing. Then again I have pretty bad learning disabilities and learning anything for me takes a good deal longer...sorry, tangent. Scratch the itch!

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